Tpo 21
Today, having a job is important in each society, and being successful in a future job depends on many various factors in which two of them can be communication and studying hard in university. I believe that the latter is more necessary, I state my reasons in the following sentences.
The first reason which studying hard is one of the most important factors of having a successful job is that trying hard in university makes students vivid imagination. When they study hard and their knowledge increases, it makes them inventor, so they are able to create new ideas in their job that absolutely has a lot of benefits such as increasing the number of customers, as a result, it can raise their income. As an example, my friend was a top computer student in our university and I remember that he was always in a library and his time was spent on research about the newest technology, after graduating he fabricate a new electronic device which sold lots of it and made him a rich person, so being a hardworking student makes a creative person that has a good effect on a future job.
The second reason which studying hard is more important than having a good relationship for having a successful job is that when you study hard you definitely study about different fields, so you can understand which of the fields is your favorite then you can focus on that, as a consequence, if you interest in a field of study and use it on your job, you do not give up and work hard, so it affects success of your job. For example, my brother was a hardworking person and he always got A grade in every course, after university his favorite was determined and he was able to select his job, as a result, after many years along with his efforts he established his own company and make him a successful person, so studying hard can be an important factor for being successful in a job.
In conclusion, being a successful businessman has a lot of factors that I believe, studying hard in university is more effective than having a good relationship with others because it makes you a creative person and also, you are able to choose your career better.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 619, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'fabricates'.
Suggestion: fabricates
... newest technology, after graduating he fabricate a new electronic device which sold lots...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 266, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... are able to choose your career better.
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, second, so, then, for example, in conclusion, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 53.0 43.0788530466 123% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 40.0 52.1666666667 77% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1766.0 1977.66487455 89% => OK
No of words: 385.0 407.700716846 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.58701298701 4.8611393121 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4296068528 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73285020282 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 168.0 212.727598566 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.436363636364 0.524837075471 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 567.0 618.680645161 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 3.51792114695 256% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 8.0 20.6003584229 39% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 48.0 20.1344086022 238% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 107.605761928 48.9658058833 220% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 220.75 100.406767564 220% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 48.125 20.6045352989 234% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 10.375 5.45110844103 190% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.236089414692 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.076458572812 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0737576698707 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.150856017488 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0645574589148 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 24.3 11.7677419355 206% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: 31.22 58.1214874552 54% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 20.8 10.1575268817 205% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 10.23 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.56 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 62.0 86.8835125448 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 21.2 10.0537634409 211% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 21.0 10.247311828 205% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.