TPO 30 Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours Use specific

Work has a significant effect on our live. It often determines our level of success. People believe that working three days a week for many hours is more exciting than working four days for shorter hours. Others disagree. Personally, I agree that working for many hours for only three days a week is better. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

First, the most prominent point to be mentioned is that working three days will help me to spend an enormous amount of time with my family and doing activities. Spending more time with your family will help you to relax and find serenity which are things that become low in our hectic world nowadays. Working a lot makes you feel of anxiety and stress. In addition, when you work less, you will have time to do many things in your free time as doing the laundry, shopping , and playing sports. My own experience is a compelling example of this. I remember when I graduated, I worked at a pharmacy for three days. Therefore, I have four days off so I spend more time with my children and husband. I allowed them to go to their grandparents every week on the first day of my vacation. On the second day, we went to the park to play and increase their intellectual development and their creativity. Then on the third day, I had to check with them their homework and study together to help them in the future to be professional leader which give them more opportunity to find jobs. On the fourth day, we went to the stadium to play football which help us to improve and maintain our health to protect ourselves from chronic diseases. Then my boss asked me to work five days a week for shorter hours. This is really distracted my schedule. As you can see, working less days is better for you as well as your family.

The second rationale to be rooted in the fact that is working less days can make it easier to save more money. When you work more days, you will spend more money on gas, food and many other stuffs. I have to admit that my sister is a good example of this. When my sister worked four days at a school which is very far from our home, she spend a lot of money on gas because the distance was so long. In addition. She also had to have dinner and breakfast when she was on her way. She found that she spend most of her salary on many things repeated everyday at work. This experiment taught me that working less days can help you to save more money.

In conclusion. I believe that working three days only is more advantageous. This because you can spend more time with your family, and because you will save more money. We should all recognize the effectiveness of work three days for long hours.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 472, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...free time as doing the laundry, shopping , and playing sports. My own experience i...
^^
Line 3, column 750, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...m to go to their grandparents every week on the first day of my vacation. On the...
^^
Line 3, column 1362, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun days is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...ed my schedule. As you can see, working less days is better for you as well as your ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 63, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun days is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...o be rooted in the fact that is working less days can make it easier to save more mo...
^^^^
Line 5, column 291, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...this. When my sister worked four days at a school which is very far from our home...
^^
Line 5, column 339, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'spends'.
Suggestion: spends
...ol which is very far from our home, she spend a lot of money on gas because the dista...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 404, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[2]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: addition,
...as because the distance was so long. In addition. She also had to have dinner and breakf...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 549, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY[3]
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
...t of her salary on many things repeated everyday at work. This experiment taught me that...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 606, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun days is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
... This experiment taught me that working less days can help you to save more money. ...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, really, second, so, then, therefore, third, well, i feel, in addition, in conclusion, as well as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 11.0286738351 172% => OK
Pronoun: 80.0 43.0788530466 186% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2204.0 1977.66487455 111% => OK
No of words: 502.0 407.700716846 123% => OK
Chars per words: 4.39043824701 4.8611393121 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.7334296765 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.31409652046 2.67179642975 87% => OK
Unique words: 219.0 212.727598566 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.43625498008 0.524837075471 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 667.8 618.680645161 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 22.0 9.59856630824 229% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 20.6003584229 141% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 42.27383527 48.9658058833 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 76.0 100.406767564 76% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.3103448276 20.6045352989 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.89655172414 5.45110844103 71% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.5376344086 163% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.88709677419 246% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.382876539852 0.236089414692 162% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.108674371966 0.076458572812 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.098943681018 0.0737576698707 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.275378595479 0.150856017488 183% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0607772478265 0.0645574589148 94% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 7.9 11.7677419355 67% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 79.6 58.1214874552 137% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.4 10.1575268817 63% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 7.89 10.9000537634 72% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.68 8.01818996416 83% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 86.8835125448 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.