We know that It is common to see a family were both father and mother works outside home. Becouse of the job these parents usually don't have much time to stay with their kids. Althoungh some people think that busy parent should spend their time doing things related to school, personally, I think its better for children spend the time they have with their parents doing some fun, practicing sports or plaing games.
Praticar esportes ou jogar jogos é uma forma de conexão entre pais e filhos, além disso, é uma atividade divertida. As crianças vão aproveitar o tempo gasto com seus pais, mesmo que o tempo fosse curto. Tanto quanto me lembro, meu pai sempre esteve ocupado e muitas vezes chegou tarde em casa. Mas ele sempre jogou videogame comigo antes de dormir. Algumas vezes eu já estava dormindo quando ele voltou. No entanto, ele sempre sobe escadas para me dar um beijo e boa noite. Por isso, hoje percebo que todo o esforço para tentar ficar sempre ao meu lado, mesmo que em pouco tempo, me faz crescer sem nada para reclamar.
On the other hand there are parents that spend the free time doing school activities with their children. These parents think that they are doing a good thing when they are not. Children may think in school activities as an obligation, some times a punishment and never as a fun thing to do. So these time may not be enjoyable to kids.
To sum up, I think that when parents spend time with their children in a fun way, they encourage the development of better feelings than in other activities like school.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 132, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ecouse of the job these parents usually dont have much time to stay with their kids....
^^^^
Line 1, column 258, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ent should spend their time doing things related to school, personally, I think i...
^^
Line 1, column 393, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...their parents doing some fun, practicing sports or plaing games. Praticar esport...
^^
Line 4, column 69, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a fun way" with adverb for "fun"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... parents spend time with their children in a fun way, they encourage the development of bett...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
may, so, i think, to sum up, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 15.1003584229 40% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 13.8261648746 22% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 43.0788530466 58% => OK
Preposition: 19.0 52.1666666667 36% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1281.0 1977.66487455 65% => OK
No of words: 276.0 407.700716846 68% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.64130434783 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.07593519647 4.48103885553 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.18486071916 2.67179642975 82% => OK
Unique words: 181.0 212.727598566 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.655797101449 0.524837075471 125% => OK
syllable_count: 405.0 618.680645161 65% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.6102140021 48.9658058833 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.4 100.406767564 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.4 20.6045352989 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.06666666667 5.45110844103 56% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 11.8709677419 34% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.291748365425 0.236089414692 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0953191137253 0.076458572812 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.120480212946 0.0737576698707 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.207121109075 0.150856017488 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.129034005303 0.0645574589148 200% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.6 11.7677419355 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.63 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.65 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 86.8835125448 83% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 65.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.