TPO 46
The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people.
Having attention to other's beliefs is more important among young persons in compare with older ones, and undeniably fam increases this effect. Although some people assert that all people are affected to this subject equally, but I do not think so. I feel this way for 3 main reasons, which I will explore them in the following essay.
To start with, having low level of experiences, the children can not think perfectly. In their world, all people are honest; As a result, they think positively and count on other's talking. For example, when I was a high school student, I saw an advertisement in TV for a magic cream that was performed by my favorite singer. I thought it was real and would help to my parents became look like that singer, therefore, I asserted to my parent for buying and using that product for appearing younger. Finally, they forced to apply that cream. Not only did they get desired benefits, but they also take a sever allergy.
In addition, accepting any ideas mentioned by famous people, threatening younger. They do not have enough wisdom to realize between correct and incorrect opinions. For instance, last year when one of my brother's favorite athletes suggested about vegan. He started that regime and became sick. So that we forced took him to hospital. Had he attention to his health conditions, He could not have selected that kind of eating in his crucial ages.
Lastly, having more effects on teenagers' mined, eminent people can conduct them to a positive or dangerous destiny. I will exemplify my point with a true story about some thing that have happened to a 18 years old daughter. In my country, attending in sport is forbidden for women. Last week, when a famous soccer invited people to take part as spectator in stadium, a daughter preventing from going inside the stadium for watching the tournament, burnt herself and died! It was awesome event. Wanting to reach to her goal, she lost her life.
In all, what drives some one supports that celebrities have less influence on older individuals, may fall in to 3 main categories including having more experience, better ability for recognizing situations, and less being effected by others even a famous celebrity. It is advisable that parents and other responsible persons teach their younger for facing with crucial situations mentioned above.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 102, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...can not think perfectly. In their world, all people are honest; As a result, they...
^^
Line 5, column 521, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'applying'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'force' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: applying
...appearing younger. Finally, they forced to apply that cream. Not only did they get desir...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 294, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[3]
Message: “So that” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...He started that regime and became sick. So that we forced took him to hospital. Had he ...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 167, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[2]
Message: Did you mean 'something'?
Suggestion: something
...mplify my point with a true story about some thing that have happened to a 18 years old da...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 200, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
... about some thing that have happened to a 18 years old daughter. In my country, a...
^
Line 17, column 21, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[1]
Message: Did you mean 'someone'?
Suggestion: someone
...ost her life. In all, what drives some one supports that celebrities have less inf...
^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 249, Rule ID: FAMOUS_CELEBRITY[1]
Message: Use simply 'celebrity'.
Suggestion: celebrity
...nd less being effected by others even a famous celebrity. It is advisable that parents and other...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 398, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ith crucial situations mentioned above.
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, if, lastly, look, may, so, therefore, for example, for instance, i feel, in addition, kind of, as a result, to start with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 51.0 43.0788530466 118% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 52.1666666667 90% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1963.0 1977.66487455 99% => OK
No of words: 395.0 407.700716846 97% => OK
Chars per words: 4.96962025316 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.45809453852 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59538001771 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 243.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.615189873418 0.524837075471 117% => OK
syllable_count: 596.7 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 54.7118862394 48.9658058833 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.2272727273 100.406767564 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.9545454545 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.40909090909 5.45110844103 118% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.133107320786 0.236089414692 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0373608571044 0.076458572812 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0409189438954 0.0737576698707 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0744246312586 0.150856017488 49% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0131693148801 0.0645574589148 20% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.25 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.88 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 86.8835125448 127% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 85.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.