Nowadays, it is widely acknowledged that technology development brings us increasing convenience in our daily life, such as online shopping and so on. With more and more citizens enjoying benefits from technology, some parents have concerns about whether doing other thing such as using their phones, taking their time on internet surfing and enjoying melody during study time could have disturb to their study efficiency. In my opinion, I agree with the view that there are some negative effects on learning.
First of all, lack of self-control ability is quite common in most of the students, which causes negative on study when they are disturbed by other things. Internet surfing and listening to music is so attractive to them that concentrating themselves in study is such a tough task. For example, because of lacking of self-control, I used to be addicted to surf online when I was enrolled in middle school since there are numerous information attracted me a lot, such as science fiction and animations. Most of my spare time were consumed with science fiction and animations, so that my academic performance became worse because little time do I spend on studying. Finally, in order to achieve a better score, my parents gave me another phone only with basic function.
What's more, doing lots of things at the same time could have decreased the efficiency of learning, which has negative impact on cultivating good study habits such as concentration and so on. As we all know, good study habits benefit us a lot, which makes us easier to grab knowledge and vice versa. For example, when I didn't finish my homework until 11 p.m. or later when I was disturbed by other things, while after giving up the habit that doing other things while studying, finishing homework before 9 p.m. was no longer a difficult task for me.
To sum up, the students ought not to study while doing other things which attracts their mind.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 219, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... enjoying benefits from technology, some parents have concerns about whether doin...
^^^^
Line 1, column 392, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'disturbed'.
Suggestion: disturbed
...ing melody during study time could have disturb to their study efficiency. In my opinio...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: What's
...nother phone only with basic function. Whats more, doing lots of things at the same ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 319, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...dge and vice versa. For example, when I didnt finish my homework until 11 p.m. or lat...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, if, so, while, for example, such as, first of all, in my opinion, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 43.0788530466 74% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 52.1666666667 88% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1604.0 1977.66487455 81% => OK
No of words: 326.0 407.700716846 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.92024539877 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.24917287072 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61804379959 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 191.0 212.727598566 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.585889570552 0.524837075471 112% => OK
syllable_count: 500.4 618.680645161 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.59856630824 42% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 20.6003584229 58% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 59.5363451086 48.9658058833 122% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.666666667 100.406767564 133% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.1666666667 20.6045352989 132% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.58333333333 5.45110844103 139% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.337841287196 0.236089414692 143% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.112430626698 0.076458572812 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0830821221551 0.0737576698707 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.206894696151 0.150856017488 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0265821505505 0.0645574589148 41% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.3 11.7677419355 130% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 10.1575268817 124% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 10.9000537634 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.66 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 86.8835125448 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 86.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 26.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.