Your school has received a gift of money. What do you think is the best way for your school to spend this money? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.

Essay topics:

Your school has received a gift of money. What do you think is the best way for your school to spend this money? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.

There are many problems in my school but most of them minor problems which easily could be fixed without large amount of money. However, there is the most important and vital issue about sports facilities in my school. From my point of view, the best way for my school to spend this money is to solve the problem with sports facilities by building new football field, new changing rooms, and new gym.
First of all, the school should build new football field because there is no suitable field for students to play football during the physical class. Students have to play in the sandy and tough place near the school. For example, even when I was studying in my school we used to play football with classmates in this place and the conditions were really harsh because the place was rocky and every player was injured during the game and it was terrible when you see your feet broken and in the cast. In my experience I two times broke my leg playing football. Therefore the school should build new comfortable and safe field with perfect facilities.
Second, the school should pay a close attention to the changing rooms. There is even one changing room in the entire school and it contradicts even to sanitary norms. Many classes coincided with other classes and students had to change in this only, small room. For example, when I was studying at school it was a fight to change, to wear your sports clothes because in the sole changing room were about 30 people changing out of school uniform into sport clothes at the same time. Also there were many thieves because in this mess you hardly could find your stuff. Therefore the school should build new at least three changing rooms.
Finally, it would be great if the school administration would build a new gym because it would be a great opportunity for students who work out in the other sports centers and pay much money to them, to do some physical activity without going to these centers. Even if the school would set a small fee the school would make some money and would be able to deal with other problems as well.
When all is said and done, from my perspective the school should spend money to build new sports facilities like football field, changing rooms, and gym to make the students’ life easier, comfortable, enjoyable, and pleasurable.

Votes
Average: 6.8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
There are many problems in my school but...
^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eld, new changing rooms, and new gym. First of all, the school should build ne...
^^^^
Line 2, column 565, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...wo times broke my leg playing football. Therefore the school should build new comfortable...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d safe field with perfect facilities. Second, the school should pay a close at...
^^^
Line 3, column 486, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...rm into sport clothes at the same time. Also there were many thieves because in this...
^^^^
Line 3, column 570, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
... mess you hardly could find your stuff. Therefore the school should build new at least th...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ld new at least three changing rooms. Finally, it would be great if the school...
^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... to deal with other problems as well. When all is said and done, from my persp...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, however, if, really, second, so, therefore, well, at least, for example, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 29.0 43.0788530466 67% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1916.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 408.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 4.69607843137 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49433085973 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.31963249784 2.67179642975 87% => OK
Unique words: 187.0 212.727598566 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.458333333333 0.524837075471 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 550.8 618.680645161 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 9.59856630824 10% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 70.9315182187 48.9658058833 145% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.705882353 100.406767564 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.58823529412 5.45110844103 121% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.232232132311 0.236089414692 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0795047423675 0.076458572812 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0400583640275 0.0737576698707 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130415537933 0.150856017488 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0270931901496 0.0645574589148 42% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 11.7677419355 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 72.5 58.1214874552 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.28 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.72 8.01818996416 84% => OK
difficult_words: 49.0 86.8835125448 56% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 68.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.