Altruism
The author states that there are many instances where both animals and humans engage in altruistic behavior, the behavior where the actors (or individual acting altruistically) gain nothing for themselves. However, the lecturer disagrees with the points given by the author and provides examples which indicate that those acts are, in fact, not altruistic and there is some sort of gain for themselves.
The author says that the unselfish behavior occurs both in humans and animals. Among humans, people always share food or shelter with strangers or even donate body organs to family members or even strangers. Among animals, meerkats can be good manifestation of such behavior. First of all, while staying on guard and looking out for predators and starving, others would be foraging for food or eating obtained food. Secondly, by staying on guard sentinel meerkat is at a higher risk because if it sees a predator approaching it gives an alarm to the whole group who has better chances of saving their lives. Finally, when an alarm is given, sentinel meerkat has to run alone while others will be able to defend themselves with collective effort.
However, the speaker talks about recent research that closely studied meerkats’ behavior and asserts that there is actually a gain for sentinels as well. Firstly, the standing on guard meerkat does not starve because it eats before guarding, so it stays on lookout with a full stomach. In addition, the sentinel meerkat is safer than others because it stays near the burrow during lookout. Thus, others are in a greater dander than him. Last, but certainly not least, sentinel does not run alone because the cue about approaching predator is for either gathering together or seek shelter and hiding. Furthermore, regarding human altruistic behavior, a person donating his organ gains non-material praise such as appreciation and a sense of self-worthiness from others life family and strangers.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, look, regarding, second, secondly, so, thus, well, while, as to, in addition, in fact, sort of, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 10.4613686534 115% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 5.04856512141 59% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 7.30242825607 233% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 10.0 12.0772626932 83% => OK
Pronoun: 17.0 22.412803532 76% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 30.3222958057 119% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 5.01324503311 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1643.0 1373.03311258 120% => OK
No of words: 315.0 270.72406181 116% => OK
Chars per words: 5.21587301587 5.08290768461 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.21286593061 4.04702891845 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63477528763 2.5805825403 102% => OK
Unique words: 188.0 145.348785872 129% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.596825396825 0.540411800872 110% => OK
syllable_count: 495.0 419.366225166 118% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 3.25607064018 0% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.23620309051 97% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.25165562914 160% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 2.5761589404 233% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 13.0662251656 107% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 21.2450331126 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.4618511864 49.2860985944 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.357142857 110.228320801 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.5 21.698381199 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 13.0714285714 7.06452816374 185% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 4.09492273731 73% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 0.0 4.19205298013 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 4.33554083885 254% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 4.45695364238 45% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.27373068433 23% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.272083759551 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.0996497079465 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0662205650399 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.162205337803 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0443174109184 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 13.3589403974 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 53.8541721854 91% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 11.0289183223 108% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.29 12.2367328918 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.89 8.42419426049 106% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 63.6247240618 130% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.7273730684 98% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.498013245 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.2008830022 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Minimum four paragraphs wanted. The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
Less contents wanted from the reading passages(25%), more content wanted from the lecture (75%).
Don't need a conclusion paragraph.
Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.