TOEFL T P O 34 Integrated Writing Task

In this set of materials, the author of the reading passage explains three hypotheses of sea cow went extinct in 1768. However, the professor thinks the author's theories contain some defects.

First of all, the author claims that the reason sea cows became extinct is overhunting by native people. However, the professor disagrees. He indicates that the sea cows are quite huge about 9 meters length and 10 pounds, therefore, the native people couldn't hunt them so easily.

In addition, the author states that it is possible the kelp, which is the important food source of the sea cows, is declined due to ecosystems changes. On the contrary, the professor refutes the idea by saying if ecosystems had changed in that time cause the kelp declined, and other species should have declined either and use whales as an example.

Finally, the author raises the point that European fur traders may hunt the sea cows with weapons and caused the sea cow populations went down and go extinct. On the other hand, the professor asserts that the populations of the sea cow are small already for 100 years before the European traders came. Therefore, there's is no connection between the European fur traders and the populations of sea cows.

Votes
Average: 8.5 (2 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 252, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: couldn't
...10 pounds, therefore, the native people couldnt hunt them so easily. In addition, t...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 314, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: there's
...e the European traders came. Therefore, theres is no connection between the European f...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, however, if, may, so, therefore, in addition, first of all, on the contrary, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 10.4613686534 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 5.04856512141 40% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 7.30242825607 82% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 12.0772626932 58% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 10.0 22.412803532 45% => OK
Preposition: 21.0 30.3222958057 69% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 5.01324503311 40% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1029.0 1373.03311258 75% => OK
No of words: 208.0 270.72406181 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.94711538462 5.08290768461 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.79765784423 4.04702891845 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.45973021774 2.5805825403 95% => OK
Unique words: 122.0 145.348785872 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.586538461538 0.540411800872 109% => OK
syllable_count: 305.1 419.366225166 73% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 3.25607064018 31% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.23620309051 109% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 2.5761589404 155% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 13.0662251656 77% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 21.2450331126 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.4167761099 49.2860985944 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.9 110.228320801 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8 21.698381199 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.0 7.06452816374 156% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 4.19205298013 48% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 4.33554083885 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 4.45695364238 90% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.27373068433 70% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.473699317291 0.272083759551 174% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.180100809861 0.0996497079465 181% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.114832500479 0.0662205650399 173% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.264357517458 0.162205337803 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.100900009306 0.0443174109184 228% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 13.3589403974 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 53.8541721854 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 11.0289183223 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.43 12.2367328918 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.89 8.42419426049 94% => OK
difficult_words: 43.0 63.6247240618 68% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.7273730684 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.498013245 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.2008830022 89% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.