TOEFL TPO 37 integrated writing question

Essay topics:

TOEFL TPO 37 integrated writing question

The article states that, one of the threats of sea turtle is using of nets of shrimper boats. Solving that problem, there is a device called TED Turtle Excluder Device which provides a passage through which the turtles can escape; however this device got many critics. The article provides 3 reasons to illustrate that. However, the lecturer contradicts the article and refutes all of the author’s reasons.
First of all, the article states that the turtle rarely trapped by the shrimper. One turtle is trapped per month. However the lecturer mentions that are true that turtle is rarely trapped but accidently there are thousands of small turtle trapped by shrimper boats which lead to a tremendous harm and a big problem affects the whole turtle industry and whole shrimp industry as well.

Secondly, the article claims that there are many alternative methods of protecting sea turtle which are more effective than TED. On the other hand, the lecturer says that’s in theory. Confirming that those alternative boats are far from the sea and government cannot monitor the time used to release the endangered turtles.
Last but not least, the article addresses that TED is not effective for large species of endangered sea turtles; on the contrary the lecturer mentions that TED indeed is small for large species of sea turtles but the design doesn’t affect the devices’ function so there’s no problem.

Votes
Average: 8 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 379, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...rer contradicts the article and refutes all of the author's reasons. First of all...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...utes all of the author's reasons. First of all, the article states that th...
^^^
Line 2, column 118, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...mper. One turtle is trapped per month. However the lecturer mentions that are true tha...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... and whole shrimp industry as well. Secondly, the article claims that there ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ed to release the endangered turtles. Last but not least, the article addresse...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, second, secondly, so, well, first of all, on the contrary, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 10.4613686534 105% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 5.04856512141 40% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 7.30242825607 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 12.0772626932 124% => OK
Pronoun: 13.0 22.412803532 58% => OK
Preposition: 20.0 30.3222958057 66% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 5.01324503311 40% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1200.0 1373.03311258 87% => OK
No of words: 232.0 270.72406181 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.1724137931 5.08290768461 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.90276135726 4.04702891845 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59939167858 2.5805825403 101% => OK
Unique words: 122.0 145.348785872 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.525862068966 0.540411800872 97% => OK
syllable_count: 365.4 419.366225166 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 3.25607064018 0% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.23620309051 85% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 2.5761589404 78% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 13.0662251656 84% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 21.2450331126 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 83.1071199623 49.2860985944 169% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.090909091 110.228320801 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0909090909 21.698381199 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.81818181818 7.06452816374 125% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 4.19205298013 119% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 4.33554083885 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 4.45695364238 135% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.27373068433 47% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.272083759551 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.0996497079465 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0662205650399 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.162205337803 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0443174109184 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 13.3589403974 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 53.8541721854 93% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.0289183223 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 12.2367328918 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.63 8.42419426049 102% => OK
difficult_words: 58.0 63.6247240618 91% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.7273730684 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.498013245 99% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.2008830022 125% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.