TPO 46

Essay topics:

TPO 46

The reading claims that it is more useful keep patient's data in electronic files than paper files and presents three reasons to support its approach. However, the lecturer finds all ideas have been mentioned by the reading dubious and provides some evidences to refute them all.

At the first place, the author asserts that storing data as paper files are expensive because it needs a considerable storage space. But the electronic files occupy only virtual space and its cost in transferring data is much less than copying, faxing etc. Also, doctors have access to database in anywhere. In contrast, the speaker brings up the idea that doctors also keep paper records for emergency condition or their data need doctors' signature. So doctors who adopt electronic files must pay money for storage space to keeping paper records.

Furthermore, the reading passage holds the view that electronic medical records can reduce mistakes and errors because of poor handwriting, inappropriate transcription of data etc. As the paper records have not the uniform style, it can increase the percentage of mistake. Conversely, the professor dismisses this issue due to the fact that doctors need to take note and write their advice on paper. So their staff office must rewrite their data into electronic file. This procedure can make a mistake because the employees may mislead the handwriting or enter a wrong data into computer.

Finally, the reading argues that electronic files can help to improve researcher's data bank and they have access patients' data easily. Also, they have a lot of information in cheap way. On the contrary, the lecturer underlines the fact that researchers cannot access the patient's data. There is a strict privacy law in America that the medical data must keep private and the procedure to access them is very complex. There are many permissions and the patients can block their data.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 91, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...at electronic medical records can reduce mistakes and errors because of poor hand...
^^
Line 7, column 272, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'patients'' or 'patient's'?
Suggestion: patients'; patient's
...fact that researchers cannot access the patients data. There is a strict privacy law in ...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, conversely, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, may, so, in contrast, on the contrary

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 10.4613686534 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 5.04856512141 238% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 11.0 7.30242825607 151% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 12.0772626932 75% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 22.412803532 107% => OK
Preposition: 25.0 30.3222958057 82% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 5.01324503311 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1600.0 1373.03311258 117% => OK
No of words: 311.0 270.72406181 115% => OK
Chars per words: 5.14469453376 5.08290768461 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.19942759058 4.04702891845 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53939911892 2.5805825403 98% => OK
Unique words: 169.0 145.348785872 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.543408360129 0.540411800872 101% => OK
syllable_count: 506.7 419.366225166 121% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 3.25607064018 92% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.23620309051 97% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.25165562914 80% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 2.5761589404 116% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 13.0662251656 130% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 21.2450331126 85% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.6758765287 49.2860985944 72% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.1176470588 110.228320801 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2941176471 21.698381199 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.0 7.06452816374 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 4.19205298013 48% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 4.33554083885 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 4.45695364238 135% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.27373068433 187% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.387503042974 0.272083759551 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.120924748014 0.0996497079465 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0650266916396 0.0662205650399 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.223208557677 0.162205337803 138% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0684787851928 0.0443174109184 155% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 13.3589403974 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 53.8541721854 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 11.0289183223 93% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.53 12.2367328918 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.34 8.42419426049 99% => OK
difficult_words: 75.0 63.6247240618 118% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.7273730684 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.498013245 88% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.2008830022 89% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.