Argue 157: The following appeared in a memo from the marketing director of Top Dog Pet Stores.
“Five years ago Fish Emporium started advertising in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly. Their stores saw sales increase by 15 percent after their ads began appearing in the magazine. The three Fish Emporium stores in Gulf City saw an even greater increase than that. Because Top Dog Pet Stores is based in Gulf City, it seems clear that we should start placing our own ads in Exotic Pets Monthly. If we do so, we will be sure to reverse the recent trend of declining sales and start making a profit again.”
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In this memo, the director argues that Top Dog Pet Stores should follow Fish Emporium to start making a profit again. Although the argument seems solid for the first glance, the unsubstantiated assumptions lead me to question the soundness of the argument.
First, the director assumes that the advertisement in Exotic Pet Monthly yields the profit increase directly. However, it is possible that the profit increase may be originated from the other factors such as the good economical condition of the society and the position of the Gulf City. Basically, raising a pet needs substantial money, so it is plausible that it is affected by the economical condition of the society significantly. In addition, if the position of the Gulf City is beside the gulf, then the citizens of Gulf City may familiar with the ocean creatures, and the interest about the fishes maybe larger with respect to other cities also.
Second, the assumption that the director made about the background of the commercial is not credible. Since the commercial was posted five years ago in magazine, so it may bring different effects for nowadays. The interest of the citizens, the economical condition of the citizen, and even the spare time to raise the pet of the citizen may totally different compared with the five years ago. In addition, the 15% of the profit increase is possibly minute quantity if the original profit is low. For example, if the original profit is the $ 100, then the profit they earn through the advertisement is only $ 15.
Lastly, the director assumes that the recent trend of declining sales may be diverted through the advertisement, and raise the profit of Top Dog Pet Stores. What if recent declining is not due to the lack of advertisement, but due to the other factors such as decreasing preference of the customers for the pet? Since there are many possible reasons for the sales declination, declining trend may not be affected by the advertisement. Even if the recent declining tendency is because of the lack of advertisement, advertising fee is needed for the advertisement. If the advertising fee overcomes the income that they possibly earn, then the advertisement is not the profit for Top Dog Pet Stores.
In brief, the author’s claim is unconvincing on many grounds. To bolster the argument, the author needs to support additional information that reinforce the aforementioned assumptions.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 397 350
No. of Characters: 1960 1500
No. of Different Words: 173 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.464 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.937 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.834 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 140 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 107 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 85 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.056 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.778 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.889 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.347 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.591 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.13 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 648, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
...ybe larger with respect to other cities also. Second, the assumption that the dir...
^^^^
Line 5, column 540, Rule ID: CURRENCY_SPACE[1]
Message: The currency mark is usually written without any whitespace: '$100'.
Suggestion: $100
... example, if the original profit is the $ 100, then the profit they earn through the ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 607, Rule ID: CURRENCY_SPACE[1]
Message: The currency mark is usually written without any whitespace: '$15'.
Suggestion: $15
... earn through the advertisement is only $ 15. Lastly, the director assumes that th...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, lastly, may, second, so, then, for example, in addition, in brief, such as, with respect to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.9520958084 54% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 28.8173652695 56% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 55.5748502994 81% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 16.3942115768 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2025.0 2260.96107784 90% => OK
No of words: 397.0 441.139720559 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.10075566751 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46372701284 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96108261472 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 180.0 204.123752495 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.453400503778 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 632.7 705.55239521 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 34.2705737072 57.8364921388 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 112.5 119.503703932 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0555555556 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.77777777778 5.70786347227 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.208160709957 0.218282227539 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0715704811723 0.0743258471296 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0815851101107 0.0701772020484 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.111071885972 0.128457276422 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0610209737459 0.0628817314937 97% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 14.3799401198 95% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.3 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.35 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 98.500998004 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.