"Erosion of beach sand along the shores of Tria Island is a serious threat to our island and our tourist industry. In order to stop the erosion, we should charge people for using the beaches. Although this solution may annoy a few tourists in the short term, it will raise money for replenishing the sand. Replenishing the sand, as was done to protect buildings on the nearby island of Batia, will help protect buildings along our shores, thereby reducing these buildings' risk of additional damage from severe storms. And since beaches and buildings in the area will be preserved, Tria's tourist industry will improve over the long term."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The arguments states that Tria's tourist industry will improve over long term if they charge people for using beaches. The argument is based on few assumptions. If the assumptions prove invalid, then the argument falls apart. Specific evidence is needed to support the argument.
Firstly, Is there any evidence that tourists will pay the money for using the beaches if they charge more and will there be constant or increasing number of people visiting the island if they charge money? If the people don't wish to visit the island because of being charged for using the beaches, then the tourist industry will degrade instead of improving. In the above case, the argument falls apart. There should be some evidence that many people are willing to pay charges even if they are more for supporting the argument.
Secondly, Will the money which is charged for using the beaches be used for replenishing sand? Will replenishing the sand help protect buildings along the shores? If the more amount of the raised money is used for purposes other than replenishing sand, then it will be waste of money for the tourists and it cannot help improving the tourist industry. If there are rare cases of severe storms in the island, then it will be waste of money if they use money for replenishing sand which reduces buildings' risk of damage from severe storms. Even if the money is fairly used for replenishing the sand and there are more cases of severe storms in the islands, there is no evidence that most of the tourists stay in the buildings along the shores. If there is proper evidence that more people stay in the buildings along the shore and raised money will be fairly used for replenishing sand, then it provides support to the argument.
Thirdly, there should be some evidence that only raising money for using beaches will help improve the tourist industry. There can be some alternative ways which helps in improving tourist industry over the short term. If the alternate ways are not analyzed, then it will take longer time for tourist industry to improve. If many alternative ways for improving the tourist industry are discussed and charging money for using beaches is chosen as the best way among all, then it provides support to the argument.
There should be some proper evidence that charging money is the best way for improving the Tria's tourist industry. The assumptions supported by evidence strengthens the argument. If the assumptions are invalid, then they undermine the argument.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 423 350
No. of Characters: 2037 1500
No. of Different Words: 140 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.535 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.816 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.358 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 140 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 102 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 67 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 29 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.143 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.357 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.369 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.585 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.172 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 15, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'state'.
Suggestion: state
The arguments states that Trias tourist industry will improv...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 221, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...and if they charge money? If the people dont wish to visit the island because of bei...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, then, third, thirdly, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.6327345309 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 55.5748502994 58% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2085.0 2260.96107784 92% => OK
No of words: 422.0 441.139720559 96% => OK
Chars per words: 4.94075829384 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.53239876712 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.42763346414 2.78398813304 87% => OK
Unique words: 146.0 204.123752495 72% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.345971563981 0.468620217663 74% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 648.9 705.55239521 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 4.96107784431 0% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 2.70958083832 332% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.8482549017 57.8364921388 95% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.2857142857 119.503703932 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0952380952 23.324526521 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.28571428571 5.70786347227 58% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 6.88822355289 160% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.248508564819 0.218282227539 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.101189570568 0.0743258471296 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0697047762046 0.0701772020484 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.162552473438 0.128457276422 127% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0445105650737 0.0628817314937 71% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 14.3799401198 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.37 12.5979740519 90% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.84 8.32208582834 82% => OK
difficult_words: 59.0 98.500998004 60% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.