Fifteen years ago, Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged
students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors. Since that time, Omega
professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade
averages at Omega have risen by 30 percent. Potential employers, looking at this dramatic
rise in grades, believe that grades at Omega are inflated and do not accurately reflect student
achievement; as a result, Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have
graduates from nearby Alpha University. To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega
University should terminate student evaluation of professors.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the
argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author recommends that Omega University should discontinue student evaluation of professors to enable its graduates to secure better jobs. The suggestion is mainly based on that Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes after the emergence of the evaluation, which engender that the potential employers believe the higher grades at Omega are inflated and do not really reflect student achievement. Nonetheless, some further proofs should be provided to better evaluate the argument.
The author mentions that Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged
students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors fifteen years ago and since that time, Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes. And he infers that it is the former event that resulted in the latter one. However, the sequence of the events, in itself, does not sufficiently proves the causality between them. In all likelihood, the professors are more patient to teach the students due to the evaluation procedure, then more students can easily understand what they have learned and acquire higher scores. It is also possible that the school has made other efforts to improve the quality of students, such as implementing stricter regulations or recruiting more excellent students than before. Hence, some further credence should be afforded to substantiate the argument.
The author also deduces that the potential employers believed the higher at Omega are inflated and fail to reflect the real achievements of the students, that’ why the graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. Nevertheless, the argument takes a factor that might contribute to an explanation of the observed difference as a sufficient explanation for that difference, which is far-fetched without specific proofs being offered. It is entirely possible that the quality of the students in these two universities are quite different. Maybe the Alpha university is the top university, while the Omega University is in a poor condition. Consequently, it is likely that the graduates of Omega University are harder to find jobs than the ones from Alpha University all the time, and it is irrelevant with the evaluation procedure. Additionally, maybe the main majors in Alpha University are the ones popular in the job market, such as Laws or Computer, while the ones in Omega University are majors like archaeology or Philosophy, which is hard for students to find a job. Under these scenarios, the argument cannot hold water.
Although Omega University suspend the student evaluation of the professors, it is not ascertained that they can secure better jobs. Specific evidence should be offered to strengthen the argument. Whether a graduate could find a job is on the ground of several respects including themselves and the job market situation. For example, if an individual cannot disclose his superior integrated skills and pleasant manners and behaviors, the employers may be reluctant to hire him and they will choose other eligible applicants. Besides, the internship experience is also an indispensable factor when the employers choose a qualified candidate. Hence, it is hasty to implement the author’s suggestion in absence of caring about the aforementioned factors and scenarios.
To sum up, although the argument might be true in some aspects, some specific proofs should be released to better evaluate the argument. In that case, the conclusion and the whole argument will be more reasoning and convincing.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 564 350
No. of Characters: 2981 1500
No. of Different Words: 257 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.873 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.285 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.851 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 235 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 179 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 144 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 94 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.56 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.504 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.285 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.495 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.071 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 86, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...lemented a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effect...
^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Students
...nted a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 94, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...l their professors fifteen years ago and since that time, Omega professors have b...
^^
Line 7, column 328, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[3]
Message: The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: 'prove'
Suggestion: prove
...vents, in itself, does not sufficiently proves the causality between them. In all like...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, consequently, hence, however, if, may, nevertheless, nonetheless, really, so, then, while, for example, such as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.6327345309 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 13.6137724551 147% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 28.8173652695 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 55.5748502994 110% => OK
Nominalization: 29.0 16.3942115768 177% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3072.0 2260.96107784 136% => OK
No of words: 564.0 441.139720559 128% => OK
Chars per words: 5.44680851064 5.12650576532 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87326216964 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96290283244 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 263.0 204.123752495 129% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.466312056738 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 981.9 705.55239521 139% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 69.0494865819 57.8364921388 119% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.0 119.503703932 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.5 23.324526521 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.91666666667 5.70786347227 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.369696781864 0.218282227539 169% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0937147636302 0.0743258471296 126% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.175249145851 0.0701772020484 250% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.203413969532 0.128457276422 158% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.134965758835 0.0628817314937 215% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.0 14.3799401198 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 48.3550499002 82% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.63 12.5979740519 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.98 8.32208582834 108% => OK
difficult_words: 150.0 98.500998004 152% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 12.3882235529 121% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.