The director of Buckingham college claims that it is necessary to build more dormitories in the college. The main reasons offered to support this statement is that students enrolling to Buckingham is increasing recently, the cost to live off-campus is also increasing, and that with appealing dormitories, students will be more willing to apply. Based on these three reasons, the director recommends the college to invest on school accommodation, however, this advice is unacceptable based on several reasons.
Firstly, based on the recent growth of student enrollment, the director concludes that the number of enrollment will double in 50 years. In the past few years, the growth of Buckingham college enrollment may attribute to a collaboration with famous companies which provide the college with plentiful internship opportunities, resources, and sponsorship. The growth may also increase proportionally with the population growth. Nevertheless, a collaboration is unlikely to last for 50 years likewise, a population growth rate is barely possible to remain constant for 50 years. As a result, there are several reasons that will affect the growth rate of enrollment yet failed to be considered in this statement.
Moreover, the director suggests that due to the rising rent for students living outside the campus, it will be beneficial to build more dormitories to help students living off-campus save budget. It appears tenable at first glance since the raise in rent is burdensome for students who live off-campus. However, it should be discussed in different cases whether the up rise is resulting from economic growth. If the country has a growing trade surplus and steady economic growth, which means people are making more money, the rise will be reasonable since it’s a natural phenomenon indicating an enhancement in quality of life. On the contrary, if the owners are trying to bring up the real estate and maliciously exploit students, the construction will be necessary.
In spite of the fact that the fee of the dormitory is really economical and the room amenities are of avant-garde, it is just one of the factors for students in their consideration of choosing schools. Who would simply just use one factor to make their final decision for their choices? Besides, it is the issue of education—choosing university—that they are dealing with, which cannot be overemphasized for all regards. The factor of whether boarding the school or not is just one of the multitude of reasons for a student, a sound one, to employ as the direct cause and reason relation for choosing their ideal school. To be more concise, there are a great number of other reasons for locating the best school, such as school reputation, rating, scholarships or career assistance and the like. Therefore, an over simplistic conclusion is made for the evidence offered—establishing more new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham.
In conclusion, the recommendation that Buckingham college should build more dormitories needs more precise testaments to strengthen it. To do so, the director can provide evidence that are possible to attract more students to enroll or conduct a survey on economic condition of students renting houses out of school. The recommendation has a positive intention, yet with limited budget, it requires more supporting details and examinations.
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK
argument 2 -- not exactly
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 541 350
No. of Characters: 2803 1500
No. of Different Words: 254 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.823 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.181 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.921 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 225 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 168 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 119 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 80 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.591 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.655 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.818 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.288 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.526 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.088 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, firstly, however, if, likewise, may, moreover, nevertheless, really, so, then, therefore, in conclusion, such as, as a result, in spite of, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 28.8173652695 97% => OK
Preposition: 75.0 55.5748502994 135% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 16.3942115768 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2890.0 2260.96107784 128% => OK
No of words: 538.0 441.139720559 122% => OK
Chars per words: 5.3717472119 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81610080973 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.18893027011 2.78398813304 115% => OK
Unique words: 267.0 204.123752495 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.496282527881 0.468620217663 106% => OK
syllable_count: 895.5 705.55239521 127% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 18.0 8.76447105788 205% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.3831257096 57.8364921388 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.363636364 119.503703932 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.4545454545 23.324526521 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.27272727273 5.70786347227 145% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.202293528498 0.218282227539 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0627059932476 0.0743258471296 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0623242546045 0.0701772020484 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121719185599 0.128457276422 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0544701653695 0.0628817314937 87% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.1 14.3799401198 112% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 38.66 48.3550499002 80% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.16 12.5979740519 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.14 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 147.0 98.500998004 149% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.