The board of directors of the Monarch Book suggest the company to replace the children’s book section to a new café, which may attract more customers and make more profit, based on two main reasons. Firstly, the population of children under 10 is decreasing. Secondly, the competitor of the company, Regal books, has recently open a new café. However, the board of directors oversimplified this issue for several aspects.
To begin with, according to the recent nation census, the board of directors claims that the decline of children population might cause children’s book section become less popular. This appears reasonable if the ratio of children visiting the book store and the overall children population always remains constant, which means the children entering the book store will decrease proportionally with the decline of the population of children. Yet, instead of being less popular, the children’s book section might become more popular due to the decline of population. Suppose two families have the same economic condition. While one family has one child, the another has ten children. Comparing with the family that has ten children waiting to be fed, it is more likely for the family with only one kid to concentrate more effort and resources on their child such as visiting book store and buying books.
Moreover, even if children’s book section is becoming less popular because of the decline in population, is it worthy to close it? Children under ten are so young that most of them go to a book store with their families. With a children’s book section, parents can be reassured of their children’s safety and they can enjoy their time reading magazines or books. On top of that, children may ask their parents to buy books that they want for them, especially most parents encourage their children to read, which make these children become potential buyers. As a result, if the company decide to discontinue children’s book section and open a new cafe, it might truly attract more customers. However, there will be a following customer loss that not only reduces number of children, but also families.
Finally, in the recommendation letter, the directors urge that since the competitor is now having a café in their book stores, it is necessary to open a café too. Worried about being surpass by their competitor, it is understandable for the directors to make such conclusion without hesitate. However, they oversimplify the cost and effort that is needed to open a new café. For instance, where to find the chief and who will set the menu? Moreover, the regulations and rules for a café and a book store are totally distinct. With a café, the company will need to deal with more serious problems such as where to emit waste air from the kitchen, how to comply with the sanitarian criteria and other requirements from the government. Without considering these aspects, opening a new café will be risky and might cause negative effect to the company. Besides, the directors mention the new café in Regal Books without details and information, which the company are unable to evaluate its risk and determine whether it’s surely profitable.
In sum, the board of directors of Monarch Book have positive intention to the company, which they try to maximize the company’s profit. However, they underestimate children’s influence on their book store and oversimplify the feasibility to open a new café.
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not exactly
argument 2 -- not OK
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 567 350
No. of Characters: 2788 1500
No. of Different Words: 243 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.88 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.917 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.605 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 192 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 161 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 98 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 61 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.808 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.06 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.769 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.323 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.498 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.113 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, finally, first, firstly, however, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, while, for instance, such as, as a result, to begin with, on top of that
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 28.8173652695 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 75.0 55.5748502994 135% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2931.0 2260.96107784 130% => OK
No of words: 567.0 441.139720559 129% => OK
Chars per words: 5.16931216931 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87972968509 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90449686053 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 254.0 204.123752495 124% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.447971781305 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 899.1 705.55239521 127% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 19.7664670659 132% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.4115319209 57.8364921388 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.730769231 119.503703932 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.8076923077 23.324526521 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.42307692308 5.70786347227 113% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.215622926073 0.218282227539 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0716757633163 0.0743258471296 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0528909517402 0.0701772020484 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.152262459374 0.128457276422 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0611476524349 0.0628817314937 97% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 14.3799401198 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.1 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 123.0 98.500998004 125% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.