The following appeared in a memo from a vice president of Quiot Manufacturing."During the past year, Quiot Manufacturing had 30 percent more on- the-job accidents than at the nearby Panoply Industries plant, where the work shifts are one hour shorter

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a memo from a vice president of Quiot Manufacturing.

"During the past year, Quiot Manufacturing had 30 percent more on- the-job accidents than at the nearby Panoply Industries plant, where the work shifts are one hour shorter than ours. Experts say that significant contributing factors in many on-the-job accidents are fatigue and sleep deprivation among workers. Therefore, to reduce the number of on-the-job accidents at Quiot and thereby increase productivity, we should shorten each of our three work shifts by one hour so that employees will get adequate amounts of sleep."

Vice President of Quiot Manufacturing has given a statement saying that the increased number of on-the-job accidents compared to Panoply Industries is because of fatigue and sleep deprivation in the workers and suggests to decrease the working hours of the employees by 1 hour to ensure that they get enough time to sleep and relax well. This statement is based on many unwarrented assumptions. Inorder to critically evaluate the given statement, the vice president needs to answer the below questions.

Firstly, Are the working conditions of Quiot Manufacturing same as that of Panoply Industries? Do both the industries have the same number of workers? Lets say if Panoply Industries is a clay pot making company, where less mechanical equipments are used and most of the work is done by skilled labor instead of machines. While if Quiot Manufacturing produces steel bars or cast iron pallets. Drawing a comparision between both the industries on the Onjob accidents is really ridiculous. The Vice President stated 30% more accidents in Quiot manufacturing, how is this 30% calculated. We are not given the information about the number of total workers in both the industries. So with out these informations , we cannot evaluate the given statement.

Secondly, How can the experts be sure that the significant factor of the onjob accidents is just fatigue and sleep deprivation? This statement is completely baseless. We are not informed about the proof with which the expert have come to that conclusion. Perhaps, the accidents are due to lack of safety measures in the factory. May be the machines are obselete and cause damage to the workers. Probably, the accidents are due to risky methods of manufacturing . So, there could be various reasos these accidents could occur. Hence, inorder to evaluate the Vice President's statement, we should be given more evidence.

Only when the above two questions answered, we can critically evaluate the given statment. We should be very sure about such decisions because these will affect the safety of the workers and factory's reputation. The missing pieces of information would be really helpful in evaluating the Vice Presidents claim.

Votes
Average: 5 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 152, Rule ID: LETS_LET[1]
Message: Did you mean 'Let's'?
Suggestion: Let's
...stries have the same number of workers? Lets say if Panoply Industries is a clay pot...
^^^^
Line 5, column 679, Rule ID: WITH_OUT[1]
Message: This word is usually written together. Did you mean 'without'?
Suggestion: without
...otal workers in both the industries. So with out these informations , we cannot evaluate...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 706, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...dustries. So with out these informations , we cannot evaluate the given statement....
^^
Line 9, column 334, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (May) must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
... of safety measures in the factory. May be the machines are obselete and cause dam...
^^
Line 9, column 461, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...re due to risky methods of manufacturing . So, there could be various reasos these...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, hence, if, may, really, second, secondly, so, well, while

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 28.8173652695 62% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 55.5748502994 81% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1848.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 351.0 441.139720559 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.26495726496 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.32839392791 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91382874666 2.78398813304 105% => OK
Unique words: 183.0 204.123752495 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.521367521368 0.468620217663 111% => OK
syllable_count: 580.5 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 22.8473053892 66% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 58.9860608271 57.8364921388 102% => OK
Chars per sentence: 84.0 119.503703932 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.9545454545 23.324526521 68% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.31818181818 5.70786347227 58% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.212398077515 0.218282227539 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0617803649632 0.0743258471296 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.078914781772 0.0701772020484 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.129950449887 0.128457276422 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.083818958623 0.0628817314937 133% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.3 14.3799401198 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 47.79 48.3550499002 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.93 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.47 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 98.500998004 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.1389221557 72% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 351 350
No. of Characters: 1793 1500
No. of Different Words: 182 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.328 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.108 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.811 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 127 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 105 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 75 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.955 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.052 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.292 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.449 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.096 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5