The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of video rental stores.
“In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore’s ten video rental stores. Since we are famous for our special bargains, raising our rental prices is not a viable way to improve profits. Last month our store in downtown Marston significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 P.M. rather than 9:00 P.M. and by reducing its stock by eliminating all movies released more than five years ago. Therefore, in order to increase profits without jeopardizing our reputation for offering great movies at low prices, we recommend implementing similar changes in our other nine Movies Galore stores.”
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The statement from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of video rental store, attempts to bridge a positive correlation between the increase of profit and decrease in operating costs by early closing of the stores and eliminating the old movies. That conclusion is based on the premises that, the store in downtown Martson significantly decreased its operating expenses by those measures. But on deeper analysis, it is evident that, certain important questions are unanswered, and some vague assumptions render the whole statement a pointless one.
One such flaw is that, the owner claims that the downtown Martson store significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing the sore 3 hours earlier and eliminating all movies released more than five years ago, but he avoided the main fact that the chain is focusing on, increasing profit, and there is no information regarding profit increase by taking those measures. So, how those measures are impacting profit should be specified and the author can strengthen his claim by providing more information regarding that issue.
Another lacuna in the argument is that, as the chain is focusing on reversing the decline in profit in recent years, the owner should have provided more information regarding the recent trend of their sell and the reason why they were facing that type of decline in their profit. It is not practical to assume that, reducing the store expenses and eliminating old movies will bring them profit as there may be some other critical situations, for example, the people where they are operating mostly visit the store for movies after evening, completing their office job and other tasks. So, if they are thinking of closing their stores earlier without taking the real concern, that would eventually make the situation more worse. So, the author of the argument should provide the reason behind that decline and investigate the actual condition and do some survey to find out the real reason behind that decreasing profit.
So, to conclude, the argument lacks information and seems to provide inchoate assumptions. The solution provided by the owner lacks supporting evidence and that is why he should provide more concrete evidence and market research report, more logical information to make his argument more cogent.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 717, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'worse' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: worse
...hat would eventually make the situation more worse. So, the author of the argument should ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...eason behind that decreasing profit. So, to conclude, the argument lacks inform...
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'if', 'may', 'regarding', 'so', 'then', 'for example', 'in fact']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.252475247525 0.25644967241 98% => OK
Verbs: 0.165841584158 0.15541462614 107% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0866336633663 0.0836205057962 104% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0371287128713 0.0520304965353 71% => OK
Pronouns: 0.039603960396 0.0272364105082 145% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.10396039604 0.125424944231 83% => OK
Participles: 0.0668316831683 0.0416121511921 161% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.60269568633 2.79052419416 93% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0148514851485 0.026700313972 56% => OK
Particles: 0.00247524752475 0.001811407834 137% => OK
Determiners: 0.123762376238 0.113004496875 110% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.019801980198 0.0255425247493 78% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0148514851485 0.0127820249294 116% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2304.0 2731.13054187 84% => OK
No of words: 370.0 446.07635468 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.22702702703 6.12365571057 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38581623665 4.57801047555 96% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.413513513514 0.378187486979 109% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.291891891892 0.287650121315 101% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.218918918919 0.208842608468 105% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.12972972973 0.135150697306 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60269568633 2.79052419416 93% => OK
Unique words: 184.0 207.018472906 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.497297297297 0.469332199767 106% => OK
Word variations: 52.9606525719 52.1807786196 101% => OK
How many sentences: 11.0 20.039408867 55% => OK
Sentence length: 33.6363636364 23.2022227129 145% => OK
Sentence length SD: 80.7713843445 57.7814097925 140% => OK
Chars per sentence: 209.454545455 141.986410481 148% => OK
Words per sentence: 33.6363636364 23.2022227129 145% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.727272727273 0.724660767414 100% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.14285714286 78% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 3.58251231527 56% => OK
Readability: 62.8255528256 51.9672348444 121% => OK
Elegance: 1.74489795918 1.8405768891 95% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.328499658088 0.441005458295 74% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.164056915759 0.135418324435 121% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0473562733788 0.0829849096947 57% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.678675059061 0.58762219726 115% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.131822289916 0.147661913831 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.164741352337 0.193483328276 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.115160386674 0.0970749176394 119% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.452903017078 0.42659136922 106% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0615495918344 0.0774707102158 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.230216124031 0.312017818177 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.116899458285 0.0698173142475 167% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.33743842365 96% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.87684729064 29% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.82512315271 21% => More neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 8.0 6.46551724138 124% => OK
Negative topic words: 2.0 5.36822660099 37% => OK
Neutral topic words: 1.0 2.82389162562 35% => OK
Total topic words: 11.0 14.657635468 75% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
---------------------
Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.