The following appeared on the Mozart School of Music Web site.
"The Mozart School of Music should be the first choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons. First of all, the Mozart School welcomes youngsters at all ability and age levels; there is no audition to attend the school. Second, the school offers instruction in nearly all musical instruments as well a wide range of styles and genres from classical to rock. Third, the faculty includes some of the most distinguished musicians in the area. Finally, many Mozart graduates have gone on to become well-known and highly paid professional musicians."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The writer of this argument has optimistically arrived to the conclusion that all parents considering to start music lessons for their children, should consider Mozart School of Music. He supports this argument by stating by the school is open to admit students of all abilities and ages, there are no auditions, almost all musical instruments and styles are taught, some highly well known and skilled musicians are a part of the faculty there and many of the alumni of the school are well paid and professional musicians. The argument seems plausible at the first look, however on an in-depth analysis reveals some obvious fallacies.
First, a major lacuna in the argument is that, the author is assuming that the perks mentioned in it are enough to entice parents into enrolling their children in the school. It is assumed that the parents will not look for any other features of the school . However it is possible that parents may take into consideration other aspects too like the fee structure, the time schedule and so on. But information regarding these is not mentioned anywhere in the piece. If these are the primary factors that are being considered, then the argument will be significantly weakened.
Secondly, the writer prematurely assumes that the school not conducting any auditions and welcoming young people of different ages and abilities is a feature that parents will appreciate. There is no mention, if the students of varying expertise and ages will be segregated. It is highly likely that parents of children that are already having some knowledge of the concerned musical instrument may not want to place their children in the same place with tyros as it may hamper their progress. Also the parents of beginners may not want their children learning abreast with the more experienced ones as they maybe intimidated and discouraged by them. If this is true then the argument becomes tenuous.
Finally, the writer mentions that many of its past students are qualified musicians. However it does not mention about how those who have not made it as one these musicians are fairing assuming that it is not important. If they are having well-paying respectable jobs in the field of music or if their education in the field has proved futile. If the latter is true, then parents may not want to send their children to a place where their futures are questionable.
Thus the argument has been based on several wishy-washy assumptions which may not be true. The author must bolster these with evidence about additional information like the fees and the schedule of the school, if students will be separated based on their age and existing musical knowledge and the current professional status of the students other than those who are the highly paid and professional ones. However without any of it, the argument that considering the perks mentioned, the parents should enroll their kids in the Mozart School of Music does not hold much water.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 494 350
No. of Characters: 2424 1500
No. of Different Words: 218 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.714 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.907 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.595 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 171 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 134 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 91 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 54 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.7 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.442 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.95 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.309 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.51 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.076 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 257, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ook for any other features of the school . However it is possible that parents may...
^^
Line 3, column 260, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... for any other features of the school . However it is possible that parents may take in...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 495, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
... tyros as it may hamper their progress. Also the parents of beginners may not want t...
^^^^
Line 5, column 652, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...be intimidated and discouraged by them. If this is true then the argument becomes ...
^^
Line 7, column 86, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... past students are qualified musicians. However it does not mention about how those who...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...here their futures are questionable. Thus the argument has been based on several ...
^^^^
Line 9, column 407, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... the highly paid and professional ones. However without any of it, the argument that co...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, however, if, look, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, thus, well
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 31.0 19.6327345309 158% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 28.8173652695 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2478.0 2260.96107784 110% => OK
No of words: 494.0 441.139720559 112% => OK
Chars per words: 5.01619433198 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.71445763274 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65852752384 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 204.123752495 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.461538461538 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 770.4 705.55239521 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 73.4641919577 57.8364921388 127% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.9 119.503703932 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.7 23.324526521 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.70786347227 88% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.324217299329 0.218282227539 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0928698170582 0.0743258471296 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.106202234059 0.0701772020484 151% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187593958744 0.128457276422 146% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.104060133213 0.0628817314937 165% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.6 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.13 12.5979740519 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 98.500998004 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.5 12.3882235529 149% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.