The following editorial appeared in the Lamont Times newspaper.
"During last year’s election, only 35 percent of people living in Lamont voted, whereas in
the nearby affluent town of Chiswick, that number was 75 percent. In a recent survey of
young adults, over 80 percent of respondents in Chiswick reported frequently using their
mobile devices to access social media sites. However, in Lamont, only 60 percent of
young adults who own mobile devices reported accessing their social media accounts on a
regular basis. The survey also revealed that young adults in both towns who use social
media at least once a day are more likely to consider themselves knowledgeable about
current political and social issues, which is considered a key characteristic of those who
vote. Clearly, the number of people who vote in elections is higher in Chiswick than in
Lamont because more of Chiswick’s young adults actively participate in social media."
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could
rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account
for the facts presented in the argument.
The writer of this analytical piece has drawn an optimistic solution from a disjointed argument that the higher percentage of voters in the town of Chiswick that Lamont can be attributed to the fact that more young adults in former, participate actively in social media. In support of this he mentions a survey that revealed corroborating results. Also he mentions that the survey showed that young people who use social media atleast once a day are more likely to consider themselves having knowledge about various political issues, which is a important characteristic of the people who vote. The argument seems plausible at the first glance, but a deeper analysis reveals some logical fallacies.
To begin with, a major lacuna in the argument is that, it has been assumed that the findings of a single survey are enough to come the mentioned conclusion. There is no mention abou the reliability or the contents of the survey. Also there is no information provided regarding the number of people surveyed in both the towns. It is possible that only a few people were surveyed from either one or both the towns. Thus, the results of the survey can be generalized to the entire town. Also, the survey may have been conducted casually and people may have not answered it seriously. Thus if these points are true, then the argument by the author will be significantly weakened.
Secondly, the writer has unfairly assumed that the populations and the two towns are comparable. It maybe possible that the town of Lamont has a greater number of children and old people. Children are not eligible to vote and the old people maybe too weak or sick to go to the voting stations to cast their votes. As oppoded to this the town of Chiswick may have more young people who are enthusiastic and fit and thus have cast their vote. This may have nothing to do with their social media usage. If this is true then the author's argument does not hold water.
Finally, it has been assumed that considering oneself knowledgeable about the political and social issues is an important component for one to vote. This may not be true. There has been no evidence to back up this piece of argument mentioned. It maybe possible that the author has come accross this fact on the internet from an apocryphal resource which may not be authentic. Considering oneself oneself informed regarding the current issues may have nothing to do with the voting. If this true then again the author's argument weakened.
Thus the writer has based his argument on some wishy washy observations. Many of these might not be. There are a variety of explanations to explain the facts that he states insupport of his argument. Unless he bolsters his findings with significant evidence and proofs his argument that the lower voting rate in the town of Lamont is due to the fact that the social media usage in this town is lower, is quite tenuous.
- Living today is more comfortable and easier than when your grandparents were children 70
- Manned space flight is costly and dangerous Moreover the recent success of a series of unmanned space probes and satellites has demonstrated that a great deal of useful information can be gathered without the costs and risks associated with sending men an 68
- People s behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take In developing and supporting 70
- All too often companies hire outside consultants to suggest ways for the company to operate more efficiently If companies were to spend more time listening to their own employees such consultants would be unnecessary 50
- Laws should be flexible enough to take account of various circumstances times and places 58
Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 349, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...ey that revealed corroborating results. Also he mentions that the survey showed that...
^^^^
Line 1, column 544, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...bout various political issues, which is a important characteristic of the people ...
^
Line 5, column 230, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...iability or the contents of the survey. Also there is no information provided regard...
^^^^
Line 5, column 582, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ple may have not answered it seriously. Thus if these points are true, then the argu...
^^^^
Line 9, column 501, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ng to do with their social media usage. If this is true then the authors argument ...
^^
Line 9, column 526, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...l media usage. If this is true then the authors argument does not hold water. Fi...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 389, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: oneself
...which may not be authentic. Considering oneself oneself informed regarding the current issues m...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 483, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...may have nothing to do with the voting. If this true then again the authors argume...
^^
Line 13, column 511, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...the voting. If this true then again the authors argument weakened. Thus the writ...
^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...n the authors argument weakened. Thus the writer has based his argument on so...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, thus, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 13.6137724551 154% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 28.8173652695 170% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2424.0 2260.96107784 107% => OK
No of words: 501.0 441.139720559 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.83832335329 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73107062784 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56317891996 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 204.123752495 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.443113772455 0.468620217663 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 764.1 705.55239521 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 58.3245731223 57.8364921388 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.7777777778 119.503703932 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.5555555556 23.324526521 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.48148148148 5.70786347227 61% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 6.88822355289 174% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.130175007477 0.218282227539 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0372545498364 0.0743258471296 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0414999829576 0.0701772020484 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0803146906129 0.128457276422 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0433164149338 0.0628817314937 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 14.3799401198 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.3550499002 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.79 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.15 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 98.500998004 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 349, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...ey that revealed corroborating results. Also he mentions that the survey showed that...
^^^^
Line 1, column 544, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...bout various political issues, which is a important characteristic of the people ...
^
Line 5, column 230, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...iability or the contents of the survey. Also there is no information provided regard...
^^^^
Line 5, column 582, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ple may have not answered it seriously. Thus if these points are true, then the argu...
^^^^
Line 9, column 501, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ng to do with their social media usage. If this is true then the authors argument ...
^^
Line 9, column 526, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...l media usage. If this is true then the authors argument does not hold water. Fi...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 389, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: oneself
...which may not be authentic. Considering oneself oneself informed regarding the current issues m...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 483, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...may have nothing to do with the voting. If this true then again the authors argume...
^^
Line 13, column 511, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...the voting. If this true then again the authors argument weakened. Thus the writ...
^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...n the authors argument weakened. Thus the writer has based his argument on so...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, thus, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 13.6137724551 154% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 28.8173652695 170% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2424.0 2260.96107784 107% => OK
No of words: 501.0 441.139720559 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.83832335329 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73107062784 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56317891996 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 204.123752495 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.443113772455 0.468620217663 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 764.1 705.55239521 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 58.3245731223 57.8364921388 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.7777777778 119.503703932 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.5555555556 23.324526521 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.48148148148 5.70786347227 61% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 6.88822355289 174% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.130175007477 0.218282227539 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0372545498364 0.0743258471296 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0414999829576 0.0701772020484 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0803146906129 0.128457276422 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0433164149338 0.0628817314937 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 14.3799401198 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.3550499002 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.79 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.15 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 98.500998004 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.