The author talked about the article which said that "A recent study rating 300 male and female mention advertising executives according to the average number of hours they sleep per night showed an association between the amount of sleep the executives need and the success of their firms. Of the advertising firms studied, those whose executives reported needing no more than 6 hours of sleep per night had higher profit margins and faster growth. These results suggest that if a business wants to prosper, it should hire only people who need less than 6 hours of sleep per night.". I am not agree with the argument because it focused only on few aspects. I am discussing other aspects of study furthermore.
Firstly, In the study author focused only on the sleep of the executives and not mentioned other demographics of the peoples like age, daily routine, working time, stress level, tolerance level..etc. In the study they take executives who sleep less than 6 hours, may be the population selected for study are old aged because old aged people take less sleep. Additionally, it is also not mentioned that how much hours they work in a day. If someone work less than he or she may take less than 6 hours sleep otherwise it's difficult to say that a person can work hard and take less sleep.
Furthermore, In the study it is not mentioned that whether it is longitudinal study or cross-sectional study. If it is not a longitudinal study than the effect of less than hour sleep can't be measure. It is a strong possibility that the person perform high in initial days with less than 6 hours sleep and after that the other effects occur on surface and inhibit the performance.
Additionally, The success of the firm doesn't depend only on the executives sleeping hours. There are others factors also responsible like, economy of firm, market share, working culture, demand of product in market, strategies of working..etc. The firm became successful due to strategies of work doesn't means that it is due to the executives less than 6 hours of sleep. There are so many vicissitude factors occurs with time so to fight with them firm should have strong strategies not less than 6 hours of sleeps of executives.
In conclusion, though the author be correct in his argument to hire only executives sleep with less than 6 hours. But on the basis of aforementioned arguments we are forced to assume that author's argument is fail to deliver because of lack of evidence.
Essay evaluation report
samples:
https://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-argument-task-essays/recent-study-ratin…
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 429 350
No. of Characters: 2001 1500
No. of Different Words: 194 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.551 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.664 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.563 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 90 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 40 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.812 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.997 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.388 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.615 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.188 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 604, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'agreed'.
Suggestion: agreed
...urs of sleep per night.'. I am not agree with the argument because it focused on...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 194, Rule ID: DOUBLE_PUNCTUATION
Message: Two consecutive dots
Suggestion: .
...king time, stress level, tolerance level..etc. In the study they take executives w...
^^
Line 3, column 407, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...ally, it is also not mentioned that how much hours they work in a day. If someone wo...
^^^^
Line 5, column 111, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...tudinal study or cross-sectional study. If it is not a longitudinal study than the...
^^
Line 5, column 185, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...than the effect of less than hour sleep cant be measure. It is a strong possibility ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 39, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... Additionally, The success of the firm doesnt depend only on the executives sleeping ...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 238, Rule ID: DOUBLE_PUNCTUATION
Message: Two consecutive dots
Suggestion: .
...product in market, strategies of working..etc. The firm became successful due to s...
^^
Line 7, column 298, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...me successful due to strategies of work doesnt means that it is due to the executives ...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, furthermore, if, may, so, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.9520958084 54% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 55.5748502994 95% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2060.0 2260.96107784 91% => OK
No of words: 425.0 441.139720559 96% => OK
Chars per words: 4.84705882353 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54043259262 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69882865788 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 204.123752495 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.470588235294 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 635.4 705.55239521 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.2005022527 57.8364921388 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.444444444 119.503703932 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.6111111111 23.324526521 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.66666666667 5.70786347227 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.308531789535 0.218282227539 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.103097061649 0.0743258471296 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.134986145252 0.0701772020484 192% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.17170483292 0.128457276422 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.154238144785 0.0628817314937 245% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.2 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.15 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.82 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 98.500998004 83% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 12.3882235529 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.