The following appeared in a report presented for discussion at a meeting of the directors of a company that manufactures parts for heavy machinery:
The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in manufacturing. These delays, in turn, are due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Consider further that the manager of the department that handles purchasing of raw materials has an excellent background in general business, psychology, and sociology, but knows little about the properties of metals. The company should, therefore, move the purchasing manager to the sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department.
In the meeting of the director of a company discuss about the falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in the manufacturing parts for heavy machinery. These delays happen due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Hence, director in the meeting decide that the company should, move the purchasing manager to the sales department to the bring in a scientist from research division to be the manager of purchasing department. The conclusion of the argument relies on various assumption for which there are no clear evidence. Hence the argument is deeply unconvincing and deeply flawed.
First, the argument state that the falling revenues in the company is coinciding with the delays in manufacture and these delaying in the manufacturing the parts main purpose of falling revenues of the company. This is possible that because of revenue is decrease, there could be direction from higher management to slow down the production, which is author report unaware. There are many case that falling revenue of the company like competition becomes high in the market. There are many competitor company sales the product is cheaper than other company. Delay in manufacturing may be to make good quality material. We can find numerous example from above mentioned reason that has led to decrease the price of sales and occur major falling revenues of the company.
Second. The argument assumes that the delay is caused by the poor planning on purchasing the material. But there is not have any correlation between the delayed in the production and poor planning in purchasing metals. There are many other reason for delaying in product manufacturing. For example, it is possible that there is traffic in the production line that causing the delays. Or also in the case that product in not able enough to support the outward demand.
Finally, the argument suggests that the move the purchasing manager to the sales department and in those place bring in a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department. This state to do most weakens the argument, the manager has an excellent background experienced in the general business, psychology and sociology, which are most important skills that any manager must have. Based on them past excellent experienced and quality of decision makes the company more profitable even between large competitor and numerous danger problem. Those manager has this much skill can have great knowledge about the properties of metals. There are some another reasons to falling revenues instead of lacking of manager skill. A scientist has a skill to research and analysis the study and situation, they may be not having a sufficient skill about properties of metal. They not having great experienced in the position of purchasing the product and properties of metals.
From all the specific argument, in summary the argument is flawed unconvincing. Author can’t define any strong evidence to strengthen the argument.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 486 350
No. of Characters: 2481 1500
No. of Different Words: 201 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.695 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.105 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.665 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 191 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 157 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 97 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 54 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.692 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.628 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.423 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.288 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.477 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.077 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 377, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...sing manager to the sales department to the bring in a scientist from research division t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 568, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... for which there are no clear evidence. Hence the argument is deeply unconvincing and...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 385, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun case seems to be countable; consider using: 'many cases'.
Suggestion: many cases
...ich is author report unaware. There are many case that falling revenue of the company lik...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 121, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'had'.
Suggestion: had
...rchasing the material. But there is not have any correlation between the delayed in ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 569, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this manager' or 'Those managers'?
Suggestion: This manager; Those managers
...competitor and numerous danger problem. Those manager has this much skill can have great know...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 154, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ng evidence to strengthen the argument.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, hence, if, may, second, so, then, for example, in summary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 24.0 28.8173652695 83% => OK
Preposition: 74.0 55.5748502994 133% => OK
Nominalization: 25.0 16.3942115768 152% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2541.0 2260.96107784 112% => OK
No of words: 486.0 441.139720559 110% => OK
Chars per words: 5.22839506173 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69525374022 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75143198919 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 204.0 204.123752495 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.41975308642 0.468620217663 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 800.1 705.55239521 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 49.6245745574 57.8364921388 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.64 119.503703932 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.44 23.324526521 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.36 5.70786347227 59% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 13.0 6.88822355289 189% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.288547204302 0.218282227539 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0866201818821 0.0743258471296 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.142475190231 0.0701772020484 203% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.160216216604 0.128457276422 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.141164345472 0.0628817314937 224% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.8 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 98.500998004 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.