A recommendation was made by the president and administrative staff at the Grave College, to the college’s governing committee to maintain the school as an all-female education system rather than admit males. As a matter of fact, the college is trying to adhere to its century old tradition and is refusing to instigate change; a decision to be liable has to answer to the following three important questions. As the argument presented above is currently rife with holes and cannot be substantiated.
To begin with, the argument states that a survey was conducted among the 80% of the current ‘Female’students and these students objected the decision. However, when stating the response of these students, they never state the size of the survey, and how was it conducted. It is imperative, when conducting surveys to conduct them as scientific as possible; that is to widen the spectrum, so that it is as reflective of the population as possible. Furthermore, they had to state the questions that were asked to the students. For instance, they might have asked them: “ Would you want to have males come and overtake your school? Do you want males to overpopulate the school? Do you want the other gender around? How can we be sure that the questions were impartial, that they were not directed in one direction so that we elicit one answer or another? To make a sound judgement we need more and concise information.
Secondly, when stating that it will improve the morale of the students by maintaining an all girls school. This is a a strong conclusion based on a personal viewpoint. Morale in tself means, confidence, enthusiasm and discipline and what exactly do they mean by stating that without the male figure the morale will increase. Are we to understand that the morale was not there, and why will it increase at this particular point in time…Maybe the presence of the male figure will enhance the performance of these girls and the morale will increase in the reverse case. The presence of the male figure will be reminiscent of their brothers, their fathers, of their normal lives, and they will perform in a normal condition and as such the morality will sky rocket rather than drop.
Moreover, they state that by keeping the school as an all female institution they will convince the Alumnae to keep supporting it financially. Why do they believe that these Alumnae as a total are againt the winds of change? Depending on the survey, we have previously presented a counter argument regarding that matter. As far as the alumnae are concerned, they might be more supportive of the idea, they might fund the school more if it was turned into a mixed system. The alumae are the children of the world, they are the new mothers, entrepreneurs, engineers and doctors; they are the new innovators that will probably not adhere to the old institutional system. These women are the new leaders of the world and they have a new vision for their daughter and sons…They cannot make a claim without a proper survey, without a proper study… Their statement was false and was not based on any evidence and is as such refuted.
Finally, I believe for this argument to be cogent it has yet to undergo many steps; surveys, data, assessment and then final judgement. The conclusion was reached in a hasty manner and as such it should be refuted.
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 577 350
No. of Characters: 2695 1500
No. of Different Words: 265 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.901 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.671 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.574 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 186 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 132 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 59 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.08 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.851 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.44 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.248 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.462 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.144 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 455, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he argument presented above is currently rife with holes and cannot be substantia...
^^
Line 3, column 73, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...es that a survey was conducted among the 80% of the current ‘Female’students and ...
^^
Line 3, column 569, Rule ID: EN_UNPAIRED_BRACKETS
Message: Unpaired symbol: '”' seems to be missing
...r instance, they might have asked them: “ Would you want to have males come and o...
^
Line 5, column 116, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: a
...aintaining an all girls school. This is a a strong conclusion based on a personal v...
^^^
Line 5, column 116, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...aintaining an all girls school. This is a a strong conclusion based on a personal...
^
Line 5, column 116, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'a' or 'a' is left.
Suggestion: a; a
...aintaining an all girls school. This is a a strong conclusion based on a personal v...
^^^
Line 5, column 436, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Maybe
...crease at this particular point in time…Maybe the presence of the male figure will en...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 769, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: They
... new vision for their daughter and sons…They cannot make a claim without a proper su...
^^^^
Line 7, column 927, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...on any evidence and is as such refuted. Finally, I believe for this argument to ...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 164, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a hasty manner" with adverb for "hasty"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...l judgement. The conclusion was reached in a hasty manner and as such it should be refuted. ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, thus, as to, for instance, as a matter of fact, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.6327345309 168% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 11.1786427146 197% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 64.0 28.8173652695 222% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 55.5748502994 110% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 16.3942115768 134% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2801.0 2260.96107784 124% => OK
No of words: 575.0 441.139720559 130% => OK
Chars per words: 4.87130434783 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.89685180668 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79894660174 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 268.0 204.123752495 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.466086956522 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 873.9 705.55239521 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 4.96107784431 323% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 61.0730185925 57.8364921388 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.04 119.503703932 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0 23.324526521 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.0 5.70786347227 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.108115666995 0.218282227539 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.030230959843 0.0743258471296 41% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0602122342157 0.0701772020484 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.077512053592 0.128457276422 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.102674820404 0.0628817314937 163% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.68 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 142.0 98.500998004 144% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.