The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the super screen movie production company
"According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended super screen- produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of position reviews by movie reviewers about specific super screen movies actually increased during the past year. Clearly, the contents of these reviews are not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not with the quality of our movies but with the public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super screen should therefore allocate a greater share of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising
The argument makes a number of unwarranted assumptions in the memorandum presentated by the directorof the Super Screen Movie Production Company. Unless the assumptions are warranted with evidence the implementation of the recommendation made by the director might bring deleterious impact in the busniess.
Firstly, the srgument states that during the past few year, fewer people have attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year. In addition to that it is written, yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the past years. The statements presented shows some vague information form which no decisiove conclusion can be drawn. There is no mention of the past years actual number. Since past years is a countable number so the number of years in both the cases as audiences reduction and good reviews increment will help better comparing the events in juxtapose, since the the number of years in both the cases might be different and that will lead to different interpretation.
Besides the terms used to detemine reduction of customers as 'fewer' and 'percentage', specific movie' for increase of reviewers are inconspicuous. ACtal number needs to be presented which will evince the true scenario. It can be one of the case the fewer people can be 10 reduced viewer out of 10,000 which is insignificant and also 1 additional good movie review form 100 movies made oes not necessarily indicate in requirement of chnages in the busniess.
Again, the author states that the contents of the reviews are not reaching enough of their prospective viewers and then come to the conclusion that the problem lies with the lack of public awareness about Super Screen Movies. It can be one of the case that people are not aware of the movies of theis production house. But even to support this statement various data such as current genre of movies of the production house and the trending commercial movies need to be assesed. There are plethora of movies which are reviewed as great films by reviewers are does not match the taste of current audience. So, if the motive of the production house is to bring more audiences then they must enlighten these arenas as well. Moved by the rhetoric of the reviewer will not bring customers to the threatre rather theyr need to be topical make movies accordingly.
Even if all, the stated assumptions hold true for the support of the director of the production company and allocating greater share of its budet next year to reaching the public is the best way to overcome the current pitfall, a proper plan to execute the advertising campaign is a must. Adequate survey in target audience and myriad other parameters affecting campaign to reach people must be outlined propery in order to enjoy the best outcome.
In sequitur, the recommendation the unstated assumption as mentioned above. Without proper answer to the assumption the implementation will render both long and short term detrimental effect on the business in terms of loss of revenue, customer and ultimately sustainability.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 13 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 18 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 511 350
No. of Characters: 2561 1500
No. of Different Words: 251 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.755 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.012 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.777 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 182 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 131 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 103 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 66 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.55 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.621 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.293 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.571 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.07 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 55, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...akes a number of unwarranted assumptions in the memorandum presentated by the dir...
^^
Line 1, column 148, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Unless” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... Super Screen Movie Production Company. Unless the assumptions are warranted with evid...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 51, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun year seems to be countable; consider using: 'few years'.
Suggestion: few years
...he srgument states that during the past few year, fewer people have attended Super Scree...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 655, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...omparing the events in juxtapose, since the the number of years in both the cases might...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 655, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...omparing the events in juxtapose, since the the number of years in both the cases might...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 277, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'viewer' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'viewers'.
Suggestion: viewers
...case the fewer people can be 10 reduced viewer out of 10,000 which is insignificant an...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 659, Rule ID: COMPARISONS_NNS_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'more audiences than'?
Suggestion: more audiences than
...ive of the production house is to bring more audiences then they must enlighten these arenas as wel...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 674, Rule ID: LESS_MORE_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'?
Suggestion: than
...uction house is to bring more audiences then they must enlighten these arenas as wel...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, actually, also, besides, but, first, firstly, if, so, then, well, in addition, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 14.0 28.8173652695 49% => OK
Preposition: 77.0 55.5748502994 139% => OK
Nominalization: 25.0 16.3942115768 152% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2612.0 2260.96107784 116% => OK
No of words: 511.0 441.139720559 116% => OK
Chars per words: 5.11154598826 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75450408675 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83061296265 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 252.0 204.123752495 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.493150684932 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 811.8 705.55239521 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 22.8473053892 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.423696013 57.8364921388 113% => OK
Chars per sentence: 130.6 119.503703932 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.55 23.324526521 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.95 5.70786347227 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.227796927393 0.218282227539 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0746225242854 0.0743258471296 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0875111354589 0.0701772020484 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107715134802 0.128457276422 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.072750757367 0.0628817314937 116% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 14.3799401198 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 48.3550499002 95% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.65 12.5979740519 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.86 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 129.0 98.500998004 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 12.3882235529 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.1389221557 108% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.