An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The passage above states that the deficiency of vitamin A among the citizens of the nation of Tagus can be overturned by the introduction of a new and powerful variant of a drug which is rich in vitamin A. Furthermore the passage clearly makes some assumptions which we need to be justified and they need to be buttressed with facts and evidences. Absence of these valid theories and justifications will help prove the soundness of the argument made by the author.
The primary assumption being made is that in the nation of Tagus , it's citizens are suffering from some ailment or disease which is due to a lack of vitamin A. The survey or statistics that were deployed to gather data to arrive this conclusion need to be checked.It may happen that the conditions under which the data for the survey was collected was incorrect with respect to the reality on ground. The validity and the quality of the data gathering method needs to be checked and also it;s veracity need to be observed. If we find aberrations or anomalies in the data, then we can state that the disease or ailment may be present only among a specific age-group or a distinct class of people.
The proposed solution to this problem is a new breed or variant of a millet tablet which is rich in Vitamin A. It is also stated that the government of Tagus should actively promote and advertise this new drug, to completely subdue the problem. But before making a widespread claim about the effectiveness of the drug, it needs to be tested and administered to a variety of people , with different prior physical ailments, like diabetes, high blood pressure etc to ensure that there is no side effects. The passage assumes that the the drug will have a 100 percent success rate, but before making such an assumption or any such sort of claims, one need to do a radical check and thorough analysis of it's possible ramifications.
Lastly, the new alternative is said to be composed of millet. Though it is stated that millet constitutes an important aspect of the regular diet of the citizens of Tagus, the author assumes that the people will be inured to it when they will receive it in the form of medication. But that seems highly illogical. Humans when consume vegetables have a lot of vitamins in them, but the corresponding intake of these vitamins in the form of tablets and capsules cause harm to the human body over a longer span of time. Also ,even though the farmers are given additional subsidies to grow more of millet plants, one needs to account for the fact that does growing, millet seeds as opposed to other other plants have a profitable aspect on the farmer.
Thus with the help of the above stated assumptions and their possible rectifications we can clearly state that the passage is fallacious. These assumptions and claims need to be backed to further evidence. Even if a single one of these assumptions is proven incorrect, then it drastically undermines the structure and stability of the article.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 523 350
No. of Characters: 2426 1500
No. of Different Words: 247 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.782 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.639 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.632 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 172 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 122 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 32.688 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 17.74 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.812 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.317 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.57 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.083 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 118, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...of the nation of Tagus can be overturned by the introduction of a new and powerfu...
^^
Line 1, column 416, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ories and justifications will help prove the soundness of the argument made by th...
^^
Line 3, column 65, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...eing made is that in the nation of Tagus , its citizens are suffering from some ai...
^^
Line 3, column 265, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
...rive this conclusion need to be checked.It may happen that the conditions under wh...
^^
Line 5, column 381, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... and administered to a variety of people , with different prior physical ailments,...
^^
Line 5, column 529, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
... side effects. The passage assumes that the the drug will have a 100 percent success ra...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 529, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
... side effects. The passage assumes that the the drug will have a 100 percent success ra...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 399, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... vitamins in them, but the corresponding intake of these vitamins in the form of ...
^^
Line 7, column 523, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...an body over a longer span of time. Also ,even though the farmers are given additi...
^^
Line 7, column 691, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: other
...oes growing, millet seeds as opposed to other other plants have a profitable aspect on the ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
... a profitable aspect on the farmer. Thus with the help of the above stated assum...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, if, lastly, may, so, then, thus, sort of, with respect to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 24.0 11.1786427146 215% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 20.0 13.6137724551 147% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 28.8173652695 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 79.0 55.5748502994 142% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2476.0 2260.96107784 110% => OK
No of words: 521.0 441.139720559 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.75239923225 5.12650576532 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.77759609229 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69617318951 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 250.0 204.123752495 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.479846449136 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 792.9 705.55239521 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.7589152268 57.8364921388 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 130.315789474 119.503703932 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.4210526316 23.324526521 118% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.26315789474 5.70786347227 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.25449101796 209% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.266796959036 0.218282227539 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0843877974278 0.0743258471296 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0741963073143 0.0701772020484 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.144618550922 0.128457276422 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.086206363489 0.0628817314937 137% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 48.3550499002 109% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 12.197005988 103% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.57 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.79 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 126.0 98.500998004 128% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.