PROMPT The following appeared in the City Council Proceedings section of the local newspaper in Smithville The city council of Smithville has recommended making changes to police procedures to improve the visibility of the police force These changes inclu | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

Essay topics:

PROMPT:
The following appeared in the City Council Proceedings section of the local newspaper in
Smithville.
“The city council of Smithville has recommended making changes to police procedures to improve
the visibility of the police force. These changes include hiring more police officers, budgeting
more funds for police overtime, and directing officers to patrol significantly more often on foot
rather than from their patrol cars. These improvements in visibility would significantly lower the
crime rate in Smithville and make its citizens feel safer.”
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide
whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the
answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

Several recommendations have been proposed by the city council of Smithville to improve
visibility of their police force. Some of these include measures aimed at increasing their number
by recruiting new officers, offering incentives for working overtime and encouraging more foot
patrols than vehicular patrols by the police. However, the author automatically assumes these
proposed measures are sufficient to significantly reduce crime rate and improve the safety rating
of the citizens.
Firstly, we cannot certainly predict the impact of an increased police visibility to crime rate as
there is no evidence presented anywhere, positing any relationship between crime rate and police
visibility. If statistics of crime rate in different parts of various cities and mean police presence
were presented, and it shows an inverse relationship between police presence and crime rate, then
the author's claim would be valid. Otherwise, we have no justification to accept the argument that
improved police presence play a major role in reducing crime rate.
Moreover, there is no means of assessing the citizens' measure of safety. Perhaps a survey's results
from a representative sample of the citizens highlighting safety metrics and citing police presence
as an indication of improved safety would have justified the latter part of the conclusion drawn by
author. There is a possibility that the citizens might become agitated by increased police presence,
with fears of an unknown but increased level of crime requiring such additional police presence,
or justified fears of police brutality from past experiences or other cities that might have
experienced such. Who knows if the major safety concerns of the citizens is a potential disease
outbreak or periodic natural disaster analogous with the city?
While patrolling on foot rather than police cars might imply improved police access in localities,
there is no proof such helps to reinforce the notion of increased activity level of the police force.
We would need evidence showing citizens acknowledge foot patrols more than car patrols by the
police. Perhaps the police cars and their loud sirens already strike fear in the heart of potential
criminals and deter them, but with increased preference for foot patrols, such sirens may nip crimes
in the bud, as they would be no forewarning of likely arrests to those who perpetrate illegal
activities.
Finally, the author's claims would have been a bit more veritable if citations were made to a similar
city where such recommended measures have significantly reduced crime rate there. Since we
cannot predict the future with certainty even with carefully constructed arguments and reasoning,
such references to like regions where such have worked would greatly improve the confidence of
this new proposals' success in Smithville.
Consequently, the glaring lack of evidence by the author in positing improved police visibility
would significantly reduce crime rates in the city, makes his argument skeptical and must be taken
with a pinch of salt, until evidence is provided justifying a negative correlation between their
increased presence and crime rate. Furthermore, proof of improved citizens' safety rating being
dependent on reduced crime rate and references to a similar city where such has been implemented
and succeeded, must be provided before forming a more credulous conclusion.

Votes

Essay Categories

GMAT/GRE Argument Task

Comments

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 88, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he city council of Smithville to improve visibility of their police force. Some o...
^^^
Line 2, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...easures aimed at increasing their number by recruiting new officers, offering inc...
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Line 3, column 95, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...rking overtime and encouraging more foot patrols than vehicular patrols by the po...
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Line 4, column 94, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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..., the author automatically assumes these proposed measures are sufficient to sign...
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Line 5, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...crime rate and improve the safety rating of the citizens. Firstly, we cannot cer...
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Line 7, column 99, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...eased police visibility to crime rate as there is no evidence presented anywhere,...
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Line 8, column 97, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...lationship between crime rate and police visibility. If statistics of crime rate ...
^^^
Line 9, column 102, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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... various cities and mean police presence were presented, and it shows an inverse ...
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Line 10, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...een police presence and crime rate, then the authors claim would be valid. Otherw...
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Line 11, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...ustification to accept the argument that improved police presence play a major ro...
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Line 13, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...ure of safety. Perhaps a surveys results from a representative sample of the citi...
^^^
Line 14, column 100, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...afety metrics and citing police presence as an indication of improved safety woul...
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Line 15, column 100, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...e latter part of the conclusion drawn by author. There is a possibility that the ...
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Line 16, column 101, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...e agitated by increased police presence, with fears of an unknown but increased l...
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Line 18, column 45, Rule ID: PAST_EXPERIENCE_MEMORY[1]
Message: Use simply 'experiences'.
Suggestion: experiences
...ustified fears of police brutality from past experiences or other cities that might have exper...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 18, column 93, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eriences or other cities that might have experienced such. Who knows if the major...
^^^
Line 19, column 96, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...s of the citizens is a potential disease outbreak or periodic natural disaster an...
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Line 21, column 99, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...ly improved police access in localities, there is no proof such helps to reinforc...
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Line 23, column 94, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...oot patrols more than car patrols by the police. Perhaps the police cars and thei...
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Line 24, column 100, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...dy strike fear in the heart of potential criminals and deter them, but with incre...
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Line 25, column 101, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...foot patrols, such sirens may nip crimes in the bud, as they would be no forewarn...
^^^
Line 26, column 94, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... arrests to those who perpetrate illegal activities. Finally, the authors claims...
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Line 28, column 101, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...able if citations were made to a similar city where such recommended measures hav...
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Line 29, column 91, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...antly reduced crime rate there. Since we cannot predict the future with certainty...
^^^
Line 30, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...lly constructed arguments and reasoning, such references to like regions where su...
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Line 31, column 95, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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... would greatly improve the confidence of this new proposals success in Smithville...
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Line 32, column 10, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'proposals'' or 'proposal's'?
Suggestion: proposals'; proposal's
...ly improve the confidence of this new proposals success in Smithville. Consequently, t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 33, column 96, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...r in positing improved police visibility would significantly reduce crime rates i...
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Line 34, column 99, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...his argument skeptical and must be taken with a pinch of salt, until evidence is ...
^^^
Line 35, column 97, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...ing a negative correlation between their increased presence and crime rate. Furth...
^^^
Line 36, column 95, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...of improved citizens safety rating being dependent on reduced crime rate and refe...
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Line 37, column 97, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...lar city where such has been implemented and succeeded, must be provided before f...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, so, then, while

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 11.1786427146 170% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 67.0 55.5748502994 121% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2938.0 2260.96107784 130% => OK
No of words: 525.0 441.139720559 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.59619047619 5.12650576532 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.78673985869 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83118622127 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 204.123752495 125% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.487619047619 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 951.3 705.55239521 135% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 30.0 22.8473053892 131% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 71.2720311353 57.8364921388 123% => OK
Chars per sentence: 172.823529412 119.503703932 145% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.8823529412 23.324526521 132% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.88235294118 5.70786347227 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 36.0 5.15768463074 698% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 32.0 5.25449101796 609% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.170079769743 0.218282227539 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0712374977936 0.0743258471296 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0793489844035 0.0701772020484 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0496691526665 0.128457276422 39% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0583936769622 0.0628817314937 93% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 20.4 14.3799401198 142% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 24.11 48.3550499002 50% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 17.4 12.197005988 143% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.79 12.5979740519 125% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.46 8.32208582834 114% => OK
difficult_words: 144.0 98.500998004 146% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 12.3882235529 121% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 11.1389221557 126% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 11.9071856287 134% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, so, then, while

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments