Smartphones and computers have become an integral part of our daily lives as we depend heavily on these form of content providers for our daily dose of entertainment, education or news. The argument here states that out of 250 people surveyed, those who were online for more than 30 hours a week, suffered from depression. Although, being online for longer duration does affect our lives in many unimaginable ways, the argument is short of intriguing logic and on the other hand, full of assumptions that need to be answered or clarified before making any recommendation.
Firstly, the survey involves 250 people between the ages of 30 and 45 and showed their association with number of hours spend online. The survey has been conducted recently but how recently has this happened is not clearly stated and also who has conducted the survey is not mentioned, which both undermine the surveys authenticity and dependability. It could have been conducted one or more years ago and might not hold relevant to the current scenario of relation between time spend online and depression. The organisation holding the survey should have a fair background for these observations to be taken seriously.
Secondly, the argument does not provide any evidence whether the individuals surveyed had any previous medical condition like anxiety, stress due to work or family, etc. Without having the background of people surveyed, it is fallible to assume that only time spend online leads to more depression. The argument ignores other factors that leads to depression or anxiety like failed relationships, strenuous work schedule and less physical activity which could add up to the depression levels of an individual. The survey's finding also suggests that people had difficulty in concentration twice more than before which could be because of numerous other reasons.
Thirdly, the argument states that those who reported more than 30 hours per week online, 20 percent also felt "sad,down, or blue" at least three times within past month. But this seems very normal for an individual as everyone face lows and highs in their lives and that too very frequently. The argument assumes being "down,sad or blue" as a problem and fallaciously associate it to online engagement of individuals whereas it is quite understandable that not everyone can be happy at all times.
Finally, the argument solely blames time spend online to be the major reason for people getting depressed and recommends limiting time spend online to improve the situation. But given the individuals felt depressed by staying online, it might not be feasible for them to spend less time as it might be their job. Suggesting more outdoor activity, spending time with friends and family and balancing their work-life will prove out to be better alternatives for improving their well-being. The author needs to clarify all the above discussed points before using it as base for making recommendations to people.
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Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 482 350
No. of Characters: 2438 1500
No. of Different Words: 248 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.686 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.058 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.679 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 176 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 126 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 94 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 55 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.353 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.3 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.325 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.58 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.079 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 312, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'surveys'' or 'survey's'?
Suggestion: surveys'; survey's
...not mentioned, which both undermine the surveys authenticity and dependability. It coul...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 120, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , down
...k online, 20 percent also felt 'sad,down, or blue' at least three times wit...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 340, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sad
...y. The argument assumes being 'down,sad or blue' as a problem and fallacio...
^^^^
Line 9, column 567, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'bases'?
Suggestion: bases
...ove discussed points before using it as base for making recommendations to people.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, then, third, thirdly, well, whereas, at least, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 25.0 11.1786427146 224% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 55.5748502994 94% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 16.3942115768 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2515.0 2260.96107784 111% => OK
No of words: 480.0 441.139720559 109% => OK
Chars per words: 5.23958333333 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68069463864 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84553057809 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 255.0 204.123752495 125% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.53125 0.468620217663 113% => OK
syllable_count: 775.8 705.55239521 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 37.8700262594 57.8364921388 65% => OK
Chars per sentence: 139.722222222 119.503703932 117% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.6666666667 23.324526521 114% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.0 5.70786347227 123% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 6.88822355289 160% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.215320699358 0.218282227539 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0766393445601 0.0743258471296 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.10102194365 0.0701772020484 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.125492109839 0.128457276422 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.10281666601 0.0628817314937 164% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.6 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.41 12.5979740519 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.01 8.32208582834 108% => OK
difficult_words: 124.0 98.500998004 126% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.