“To reverse the deterioration of the postal service, the government should raise the price of postage stamps. This solution will no doubt prove effective, since the price increase will generate larger revenues and will also reduce the volume of mail, thereby eliminating the strain on the existing system and contributing to improved morale.”
The opinion mentioned above contains several critical assumptions which leads it to be a flawed statement. It claims that by increasing the price of the postage stamp, the postal service will generate greater revenue and the volume of mail would be reduced without providing any substantial evidence.
Firstly, it is mentioned that by increasing the price of the postage stamp will generate larger revenue. However the opinion fails to provide enough evidence to support this claim. Moreover, it is important to analyse the negative consequence of increasing the postage stamp. It is also vital to study how much of revenue is presently being generated by postal service because of the sale of postage stamp. By studying the revenue that postage stamp brings in, the argument can be strengthened.
Secondly, the opinion fails to analyse what is causing the deterioration in the first place. There could be a posibility where customers have different technological alternatives to postal service. Apart from the technological alternative, the efficiency and the customer service of the postal service could also be other factors which may affect the quality postal service. By focusing on why the deterioration is happening in the first place, postal service can then come up with strategies to revitalise it again.
The opinion also predicts that by increasing the price of postage stamp, the postal service could reduce the volume of mail which will eliminate the strain on existing system and contribute to improve morale. Once again the opinion fails to provide any evidence to back up the claim. Also it fails to consider other ways by which the current existing system could be made more efficient. It could be argued that by investing on the current system to accomodate for more mail volume, the postal service could generate more revenue as compared to sale of postage stamp. Also there is no proper corelation is given to suggest that the morale would be improved by reducing the volume of mail.
Due to unwarranted assumptions and claims, the opinion fails to provide a strong argument. By analysing the above mentioned points and by providing more evidence to support its claims, the argument could be strengthened.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: There could be a posibility where customers have different technological alternatives to postal service.
Error: posibility Suggestion: possibility
Sentence: By focusing on why the deterioration is happening in the first place, postal service can then come up with strategies to revitalise it again.
Error: revitalise Suggestion: revivals
Sentence: It could be argued that by investing on the current system to accomodate for more mail volume, the postal service could generate more revenue as compared to sale of postage stamp.
Error: accomodate Suggestion: accommodate
Sentence: Also there is no proper corelation is given to suggest that the morale would be improved by reducing the volume of mail.
Error: corelation Suggestion: correlation
Sentence: Due to unwarranted assumptions and claims, the opinion fails to provide a strong argument.
Error: unwarranted Suggestion: No alternate word
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 361 350
No. of Characters: 1833 1500
No. of Different Words: 148 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.359 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.078 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.671 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 144 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 113 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 40 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.056 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.753 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.556 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.362 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.58 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.11 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 106, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...age stamp will generate larger revenue. However the opinion fails to provide enough evi...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 210, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Once” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ystem and contribute to improve morale. Once again the opinion fails to provide any ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 285, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...vide any evidence to back up the claim. Also it fails to consider other ways by whic...
^^^^
Line 7, column 569, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...e as compared to sale of postage stamp. Also there is no proper corelation is given ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, apart from, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 16.0 28.8173652695 56% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1880.0 2260.96107784 83% => OK
No of words: 361.0 441.139720559 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.20775623269 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35889894354 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73177668892 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 156.0 204.123752495 76% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.432132963989 0.468620217663 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 611.1 705.55239521 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.9906239011 57.8364921388 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.444444444 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0555555556 23.324526521 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.27777777778 5.70786347227 110% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.236953902233 0.218282227539 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0866089632085 0.0743258471296 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0984893854767 0.0701772020484 140% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.14207405531 0.128457276422 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0864054836842 0.0628817314937 137% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.3799401198 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.3550499002 88% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.94 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.0 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 98.500998004 78% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.