SuperCorp recently moved its headquarters to Corporateville. The recent surge in the number of homeowners in Corporateville proves that Corporateville is a superior place to live than Middlesburg, the home of SuperCorp's original headquarters. Moreover, Middlesburg is a predominately urban area and according to an employee survey, SuperCorp has determined that its workers prefer to live in an area that is not urban. Finally, Corporateville has lower taxes than Middlesburg, making it not only a safer place to work but also a cheaper one. Therefore, Supercorp clearly made the best decision.
The given argument aims to establish Corporateville as superior to another city, Middlesburg, and provides several reasons for the same. It argues that the shifting of a corporation's headquarters and the surge in the number of homeowners, along with lower taxes make Corporateville a safer place to live and work. At first glance the arguments presented may seem perfectly logical, but a closer analysis reveals that there are several underlying assumptions that are made without significant proof or study.
Firstly, the surge in the number of homeowners is not a sufficient reason in itself for Corporateville to stake claim as a superior place. The increase could be due to a number of unaccounted factors. No analysis is performed to find the reason for such an increase. Higher availability of jobs can draw the public to an area but superiority is based on a variety of aspects such as the standard of living, medical facilities, education and infrastructure. None of these is compared while claiming that the aforementioned city is superior to Middlesburg.
Further, the employee survey casts doubt on the decision-making process of the company. Surveys tend to be biased if not carefully executed with the proper set of questions. It is not revealed what exactly was asked as part of the survey, nor is it mentioned how many of the employees took the survey. If it was exhaustive and had clearly objective questions, the results can be trusted, but otherwise, relying on it for a decision as critical as shifting the location of their headquarters is naïve.
Another point made against Middlesburg is the higher rate of taxes, an argument being used to label it as unsafe and expensive compared to Corporateville. None of the essential features that contribute to a safe city are being elucidated in the argument, so it is far-fetched to say that one city is safer than another without considering the statistics. SuperCorp shifted its headquarters not because they think the city is safer, but because of a host of other possible reasons, including the employee survey. It is not necessarily a cheaper place either. Lower taxes do contribute towards making it cheaper, but a higher cost of living could more than make up for it. Higher demand could force housing prices to rise, which in turn would make the city more expensive.
In summary, the arguments made in favour of Corporateville and the shifting of SuperCorp's headquarters are half baked at best. A proper study should have been conducted with respect to the factors that determine the suitability of a city. Many of the claims have not been backed up with any logical findings or statistics, making them look overly optimistic and poorly thought out.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- not OK. The survey is only about workers where to live, not where to work.
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 451 350
No. of Characters: 2227 1500
No. of Different Words: 228 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.608 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.938 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.949 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 160 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 125 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 87 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 59 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.476 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.327 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.269 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.504 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.048 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, look, may, so, while, in summary, such as, with respect to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 60.0 55.5748502994 108% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 16.3942115768 30% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2283.0 2260.96107784 101% => OK
No of words: 451.0 441.139720559 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.06208425721 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60833598836 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.01867091264 2.78398813304 108% => OK
Unique words: 241.0 204.123752495 118% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.534368070953 0.468620217663 114% => OK
syllable_count: 732.6 705.55239521 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.67365269461 358% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.4486328869 57.8364921388 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.714285714 119.503703932 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.4761904762 23.324526521 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.95238095238 5.70786347227 69% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.180995110067 0.218282227539 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0521606897871 0.0743258471296 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0646435792331 0.0701772020484 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0950990308794 0.128457276422 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0512655717424 0.0628817314937 82% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.3799401198 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.07 12.5979740519 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.16 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 98.500998004 130% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.