Child rearing is definitely a complicated topic to discuss, and here we have Dr.Karp and Dr.Field having different views on this, basically Dr. Field has been using observational approach but Dr. Karp
says that interviewed based approach is the correct method to find out the results properly.
The paragraph misses some points and it assumes that just because the children did not talk about the other people in the village during the interview, it means that they are being reared by their parents and not by the entire village. This conclusion cannot be made with 100% justification, because there are some other factors that could be involved here. For example, in an interview, it is clear that one would like to talk in a nicer way, and if they don't talk about their parents then it looks bad, and it looks as if they are neglecting their biological parents. So the interview itself, might have caused the children to give a biased answer they would not have given if it was not an interview , maybe they would have given proper answer if some of their close friends had asked the same question, or as Dr.Field has done, we could try to
observe their true nature.
Also, children might have been nervous during the interview, hence forgetting to talk about their relatives and all, and for them, it would have seemed right to just talk about their biological parents. This definitely weakens the conclusion
made by Dr. Karp, so we cannot come to the conclusion that the interviews are better. Rather, if we observe, provided that the people do not know that they are being observed, then there would be no bias, and we would be able to see the true reality, instead of seeing the veneer of illusion people can create during an interview. So the observations made by Dr.Field is definitely not incorrect, but it could be the actual truth about the rearing of the children.
In conclusion, Dr. Karp has made a huge jump in reasoning with the conclusion he has made about children rearing. It is clear, that with the specific evidence provided above, observations about a certain thing is most likely to be correct, and so we shouldnt jump to conclusions.
Essay evaluation report
here goes the sample:
https://www.testbig.com/story/gre-argument-essay-topic-21-outline
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 380 350
No. of Characters: 1737 1500
No. of Different Words: 173 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.415 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.571 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.395 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 104 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 75 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 34.545 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.529 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.818 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.397 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.616 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.188 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 81, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Karp
...d topic to discuss, and here we have Dr.Karp and Dr.Field having different views on ...
^^^^
Line 1, column 93, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Field
...iscuss, and here we have Dr.Karp and Dr.Field having different views on this, basical...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hod to find out the results properly. The paragraph misses some points and it ...
^^^
Line 4, column 457, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ike to talk in a nicer way, and if they dont talk about their parents then it looks ...
^^^^
Line 4, column 703, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ot have given if it was not an interview , maybe they would have given proper answ...
^^
Line 4, column 817, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Field
...s had asked the same question, or as Dr.Field has done, we could try to observe thei...
^^^^^
Line 8, column 363, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Field
...terview. So the observations made by Dr.Field is definitely not incorrect, but it cou...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...th about the rearing of the children. In conclusion, Dr. Karp has made a huge ...
^^^
Line 10, column 251, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: shouldn't
...is most likely to be correct, and so we shouldnt jump to conclusions.
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, look, may, so, then, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 43.0 28.8173652695 149% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 16.3942115768 18% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1800.0 2260.96107784 80% => OK
No of words: 375.0 441.139720559 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.8 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40055868397 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.50924050523 2.78398813304 90% => OK
Unique words: 181.0 204.123752495 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.482666666667 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 534.6 705.55239521 76% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 1.0 8.76447105788 11% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 8.0 1.67365269461 478% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 19.7664670659 56% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 34.0 22.8473053892 149% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 66.0923471145 57.8364921388 114% => OK
Chars per sentence: 163.636363636 119.503703932 137% => OK
Words per sentence: 34.0909090909 23.324526521 146% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.27272727273 5.70786347227 110% => OK
Paragraphs: 7.0 5.15768463074 136% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.186478826537 0.218282227539 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0817405974449 0.0743258471296 110% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0376046339529 0.0701772020484 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0951253200662 0.128457276422 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0345803114194 0.0628817314937 55% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.2 14.3799401198 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.89 48.3550499002 111% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.197005988 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.15 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.14 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 67.0 98.500998004 68% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 12.3882235529 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 15.6 11.1389221557 140% => OK
text_standard: 19.0 11.9071856287 160% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.