The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
The premise indicate that instilling a sense of cooperation, rather than competition in the young people of a society is the best way to prepare them for leadership. Leadership capability of a person depends on a numerous factors such as having insight, proper judgement of right or wrong, strong principles etc. These factors are to be taught to the young generations to bring out the best leaders for the society. The statement enlightens us of the best way to do so, that is, instilling in them a sense of cooperation instead of competition. I agree to the statement for two reasons.
Firstly, a work-field which involves cooperative colleagues provides the workers with a healthy environment. This healthy and friendly environment helps them have a peaceful mind which is an essential part to be able to concentrate properly on the job they are assigned with . Cooperation does not necessarily indicate the comfortable relation among the employees only, rather a friendly atmosphere among the boss and the low tier employees also play a good role in creating a healthy environment. On the other hand, if the work place does not provide a good healthy environment, there may always be a state of chaos, tumult present among the colleagues affecting the mental peace of them proportionally. For example, when a new mother has to attend her job on urgent basis, she lives in a dilemma about where to keep the baby safely. Even if she attends office keeping the baby in daycare center or some other place, she will be still worried about it and fail to concentrate on her job. Again, If the work place assures her of a friendly environment and allows her to bring the toddler to work place, she may put full attention to her job as she does not have to worry about the baby. So a good knowledge on preserving the cooperation among the workers in a work place have no alternative.
Additionally, the best outcome or profit of a company comes when there lies a relation of cooperation among the workers. When a worker helps other worker with his job, try to solve his problem or suggest him a better solution to his problem, he may expect the same cooperation when in need of. Such cooperation leads to the highest production for the company, ultimately resulting in the greatest profit. Researches have shown that, companies offering the employees awards for their cooperation tend to have a greater annual profit than the companies that encourage competition among the employees.
However, some may argue that, competition in the work field increases the chance of production by having an urgency in the workers to do better than each other. But it has been seen from the past that, such competition frequently result in ugly fights which ultimately leads to a destructive conclusion. From the discussion above, it can be concluded that, instilling a sense of cooperation is the best way for the society to prepare the young generation for leadership.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 13, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'indicates'.
Suggestion: indicates
The premise indicate that instilling a sense of cooperation,...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 223, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'factor'?
Suggestion: factor
...ility of a person depends on a numerous factors such as having insight, proper judgemen...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 275, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...operly on the job they are assigned with . Cooperation does not necessarily indica...
^^
Line 5, column 323, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ration does not necessarily indicate the comfortable relation among the employees...
^^
Line 5, column 478, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...yees also play a good role in creating a healthy environment. On the other hand, ...
^^
Line 5, column 1194, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[4]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'good knowledge'.
Suggestion: good knowledge
...s not have to worry about the baby. So a good knowledge on preserving the cooperation among the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 466, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...n that, companies offering the employees awards for their cooperation tend to hav...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, may, so, still, as to, for example, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.5258426966 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 14.8657303371 61% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.3162921348 133% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 33.0505617978 106% => OK
Preposition: 72.0 58.6224719101 123% => OK
Nominalization: 29.0 12.9106741573 225% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2465.0 2235.4752809 110% => OK
No of words: 501.0 442.535393258 113% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92015968064 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73107062784 4.55969084622 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87144674777 2.79657885939 103% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 215.323595506 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.483033932136 0.4932671777 98% => OK
syllable_count: 767.7 704.065955056 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 6.24550561798 144% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.2370786517 99% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 23.0359550562 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.9325649108 60.3974514979 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.25 118.986275619 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.05 23.4991977007 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.1 5.21951772744 98% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 7.80617977528 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.83258426966 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.216580388296 0.243740707755 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0787908115138 0.0831039109588 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0999902933964 0.0758088955206 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.161780147981 0.150359130593 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.114668728069 0.0667264976115 172% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 14.1392134831 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 48.8420337079 112% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.1743820225 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 12.1639044944 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.22 8.38706741573 98% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 100.480337079 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.8971910112 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.2143820225 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 62.5 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.75 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.