Educational institutions have a responsibility to dissuade students from pursuing fields of study in which they are unlikely to succeed.
Educational Institutions have played a major role in advent and improvement of humanity. It can be argued that they have played the single largest role in academic and cultural superiority of the human race. From efficient transfer of knowledge for the future generationw to acting as archives for fruits of the efforts of past generations, educational institutions do it all. The author states that educational institutions have a responsibility to dissuade students from the fields where they are unlikely to succeed. I mostly disagree with this opinion for the following two reasons.
In the modern age of information, the role of educational institutions have evolved dramatically. Students can much easily discover their passion and love for a field without the involvement of educational institutions. If these institutions, pressure students to accept or give up a certain field, it'd severely cripple the growth of visionaries and inspirational figures in these fields. There are numerous examples in the history, where people have excelled despite their limitations - going by author's opinion, someone who was deaf like Mozart would've been strongly dissuaded from following up on his field of passion. We would've been denied one of the greatest musicians of all time. Some global events like Paralympics would've been severly hindered, since instituions would've also dissuaded disabled from pursuing sports due to their obvious limitations. As such if educational institutions start deciding best field for a candidate, it'd stem growth of people who can persist and excel against all odds.
Secondly, educational institutions persuading students to follow or give up a particular field would set a very dangerous political precendent. The government willing to strong hand these institutions could very easily motivate students to follow their idealogy or dissuade them from pursuing a subject which may lead them to question their authority. Fields like journalism could be severly dissuaded and educational instituions would persuade students to study and follow an approach government deems fit. Some examples of this are how children are indoctrinated with extremist idealogies in some Madarssas around the world. Another apparent example of this is how their is a conscious bias in unassuming citizens regarding certain country or race. India-Pakistan or Israel-Palestine are common archtypes of such cases. Critical Race Theory in United States which is being encouraged in democrat states and discouraged in republican ones is also one such example of state forcing educational institutions to promote or dissuade a certain topic.
I concede that the author's point has merit in the fact it'd prevent a good number of students from facing failure and disappointment in their life. However, failure is not neccessarily a bad thing. Skills learnt in one field often prove useful in another. And above all, this does not supersede the freedom afforded to future generation to follow their passion against all odds.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: would've
...inion, someone who was deaf like Mozart wouldve been strongly dissuaded from following ...
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...ollowing up on his field of passion. We wouldve been denied one of the greatest musicia...
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...me. Some global events like Paralympics wouldve been severly hindered, since instituion...
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...een severly hindered, since instituions wouldve also dissuaded disabled from pursuing s...
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...Another apparent example of this is how their is a conscious bias in unassuming citiz...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, however, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.5258426966 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 14.8657303371 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 28.0 33.0505617978 85% => OK
Preposition: 70.0 58.6224719101 119% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2560.0 2235.4752809 115% => OK
No of words: 466.0 442.535393258 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.49356223176 5.05705443957 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64618479453 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.04649895099 2.79657885939 109% => OK
Unique words: 252.0 215.323595506 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.540772532189 0.4932671777 110% => OK
syllable_count: 813.6 704.065955056 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.2370786517 114% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.3894473905 60.3974514979 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.304347826 118.986275619 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2608695652 23.4991977007 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.39130434783 5.21951772744 46% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 7.80617977528 64% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 10.2758426966 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.394984939279 0.243740707755 162% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.103104031748 0.0831039109588 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.131890302617 0.0758088955206 174% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.22161875216 0.150359130593 147% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.1118648005 0.0667264976115 168% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.6 14.1392134831 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.8420337079 87% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.1743820225 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.56 12.1639044944 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.86 8.38706741573 106% => OK
difficult_words: 125.0 100.480337079 124% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.8971910112 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.7820224719 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.