Following appeared in a memo from the president of Bower Buildings:
In the memo, the president of Bower Builders concludes that they should increase the size of family rooms and kitchen and also exclude dining rooms from new homes to increase sales and profits.
To strengthen his argument he cites a survey's results, which concludes that large family room and a large kitchen are the two most desired features. He also mentions that houses containing such features from Domus Construction have sold faster. And finally states that according to suggestions of many recent buyers: a dining room from new houses can be excluded. I believe that memo does not contain enough evidences and strong arguments to accept the points suggested by the president.
First of all, the survey results have to be verified. Although the president mentions that it was contained nation-wide, the does not provide any numbers to strengthen arguments. For an example, it's not mentioned the survey that how many people took part in it, the age, gender of participants, family size of such people and most importantly the randomness of any participant.
Secondly, the president wrongly concluded that a large kitchen and family room are expected features of any buyer. Maybe, these features depend totally on the size of family and also vary person to person.
Maybe, some small families prefer large bedrooms and extra balcony, but large kitchen is not at all their requirement. Also, the overall budget of the buyer also yields in his ideas.
Thirdly, the president states that Domus Constructions sold more houses with such features. But, there are no evidences in what areas these deals have been done. Also how truthful the data is, as clearly mentioned that Domus Constructions are their competitors. Maybe, Domus Const. always sold the houses with such features and Bower Builders have loyal consumers for their stereotyped houses.
Fourthly, the idea of excluding dining room is not at all feasible. As, early mentioned such things totally depends on mindset of buyer and his/her family. There is no clear evidence that Bowers' have seen decline in home with a dining room. Without getting the clearer inputs from various buyers for long term, no such decision can be taken.
In sum, that the arguments presented by the president are not sufficient to bring any change suggested. The arguments could have been strengthened by providing more statistical details about survey conveyed.
Also, Bowers Builders themselves could have conveyed a survey about providing large family rooms and kitchens.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 17, column 164, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
... what areas these deals have been done. Also how truthful the data is, as clearly me...
^^^^
Line 17, column 284, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Always
... their competitors. Maybe, Domus Const. always sold the houses with such features and ...
^^^^^^
Line 27, column 112, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...viding large family rooms and kitchens.
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, third, thirdly, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.5258426966 77% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.4196629213 40% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 14.8657303371 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 33.0505617978 88% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 58.6224719101 73% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 12.9106741573 31% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2149.0 2235.4752809 96% => OK
No of words: 406.0 442.535393258 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.29310344828 5.05705443957 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48881294772 4.55969084622 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56377321484 2.79657885939 92% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 215.323595506 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.509852216749 0.4932671777 103% => OK
syllable_count: 639.0 704.065955056 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 9.0 4.99550561798 180% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.2370786517 119% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 23.0359550562 69% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 38.3510828472 60.3974514979 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.5416666667 118.986275619 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.9166666667 23.4991977007 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.83333333333 5.21951772744 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 9.0 4.97078651685 181% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 10.2758426966 78% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.83258426966 228% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.116336691873 0.243740707755 48% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0338623863071 0.0831039109588 41% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0421351158933 0.0758088955206 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.05806146786 0.150359130593 39% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0486345887543 0.0667264976115 73% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 14.1392134831 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 48.8420337079 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.11 12.1639044944 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.55 8.38706741573 102% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 100.480337079 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 11.8971910112 76% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.2143820225 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.