It's primary through our identification with social groups that we define ourselves
As scholars known for individual development theories say, humans start to define themselves through the interaction with social groups that shape their identifications without awareness. Indeed, I agree with the statement that the establishment of self-identification in the early stage is shaped by social groups, but I believe that people are able to reversely influence social groups holding incorrect concepts with their own belief after they can think critically and independently.
When we were bored, the first social group we met with is our family, which carries the sense of the value of our parents and grandparents, who generally are under the influence of the mainstream thoughts of the society. Children are often taught to abide by some rules and beliefs that their parents hold true. For example, parents in Asia will teach their children that they have to study hard, primarily focusing on the school curriculum, go to a distinguished college, and work in the cosmopolitan companies. The only standard of success they hold true seems to be the grades their children get on exams and titles. Under the very early-stage influence from their parents, children in Asia tend to compete with each other without the concept that cooperation is a key to the achievements of great things and it's impossible to compete with foreigners who tend to team up in the future world. Compared to the traditional thoughts of western countries, the identification of children in Asia is entirely different from that of children in western countries.
As we grow up, a time we spend on family interaction decreases, we would gradually focus on the interaction with peers, namely adolescence. In this phase of lives, we are prone to be influenced by our friends when making decisions. For example, students at National Taiwan University tend to challenge themselves through activities, such as TED, exchange students, internships, commercial contests, and hackathons. Under the impacts from their peers, they will find out the world is full of opportunities and something innovative and interesting that they didn't have chances to do and even didn't hear of.
Nevertheless, when we become adults, we often realize that what we hold true before isn't totally correct under our rationale and even contradicts morality. Most people will choose to accept the truth that the world is twisted and further change the identification of themselves in order to make ends meet. But some audacious people holding strong beliefs want to change the world and the social group they live in in the search of a better world. For example, a recently terrible social event, called 'Nth room', in South Korea that Nth room is the name of a chatting room on Telegram containing many films about sexual abuses and harrassments and there are more than 270 thousands of users who paid to the owner of that room. It makes the public realize that the society of South Korean is twisted where men dominate the society and wowen aren't treated as equal individuals and even as objects. The journalist, who revealed this event, wants to make the public spare their attention on this society and further make it become more women-friendly and equal.
To conclude, people start to identify themselves from social groups in the early stages, and they may have the ability to start to shape the social groups that impacted they before when they can think critically and independently.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: didn't
...ng innovative and interesting that they didnt have chances to do and even didnt hear ...
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Suggestion: didn't
... they didnt have chances to do and even didnt hear of. Nevertheless, when we beco...
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Suggestion: isn't
...n realize that what we hold true before isnt totally correct under our rationale and...
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Line 7, column 412, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: in
...he world and the social group they live in in the search of a better world. For examp...
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Line 7, column 667, Rule ID: CD_DOZENS_OF[1]
Message: Use a singular form of the numeral here: '270 thousand'.
Suggestion: 270 thousand
...nd harrassments and there are more than 270 thousands of users who paid to the owner of that roo...
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Suggestion: aren't
...here men dominate the society and wowen arent treated as equal individuals and even a...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, may, nevertheless, so, for example, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.5258426966 82% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 23.0 14.8657303371 155% => OK
Relative clauses : 24.0 11.3162921348 212% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 56.0 33.0505617978 169% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 91.0 58.6224719101 155% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 12.9106741573 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2891.0 2235.4752809 129% => OK
No of words: 564.0 442.535393258 127% => OK
Chars per words: 5.12588652482 5.05705443957 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87326216964 4.55969084622 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84394233815 2.79657885939 102% => OK
Unique words: 280.0 215.323595506 130% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.496453900709 0.4932671777 101% => OK
syllable_count: 871.2 704.065955056 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.77640449438 281% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 29.0 23.0359550562 126% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 58.1278083645 60.3974514979 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 152.157894737 118.986275619 128% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.6842105263 23.4991977007 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.10526315789 5.21951772744 59% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 7.80617977528 77% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.269674168848 0.243740707755 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0790188535031 0.0831039109588 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0853008239621 0.0758088955206 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.157768710224 0.150359130593 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0709679551058 0.0667264976115 106% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.6 14.1392134831 124% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.5 48.8420337079 103% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.1743820225 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.07 12.1639044944 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.63 8.38706741573 103% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 100.480337079 126% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 20.5 11.8971910112 172% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 11.2143820225 121% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.7820224719 119% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.