Scandals are useful because they focus our attention on problems in ways that no speaker or reformer ever could.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
The issue presented here invokes a critical thinking process on whether the scandals are the reliable source that can guide us on the hidden problems exist in a system (like government). A speaker or reformer may though can give a clear a idea about the existing problems in a system but their information is credible unless and until they are not biased by the organizations like political parties which does the scandals. So, I couldn’t agree that a speaker and reformer are credible sources for the system’s problem.
First of all, scandals are useful to expose the hidden agendas or propagandas of an individual or certains organisations in a profession. For example, "Vyapam Ghotala", is one of the biggest scams that happened in India, in the field of medical science. It was revealed that most of the students had no past record of qualifying the National Entrance Exam for Medical Science-a pre-requisite for medical admission, and still secured seats in the reputed colleges. This all happened under the rule of the Health minister who was independently making profits by charging a huge fees of Rs 50-60 lacs from non-qualified students. This example demonstrates the incompetency of the state governement and its chief minister who even didn't know that the scam's mastermind was their government’s health minster. Also, the lack of awareness as well as the incapablility to raise voice on the wrong among people is also reflected since they didn't raise their voice until the scam was exposed by two whistleblowers, even though many people had losses of their family members due to the medical supervison of unqualified doctors.
However, one has to understand that these scandals are not restricted to only government sectors. Bollywood, the film industry of India, though worldwide famous for its star actors/actresses, is also known as the hub of sex scandals. For example, a veteran actor Shakti Kapoor was exposed via a sting operation where he was offering film roles to the female sting agent on the cost of sleeping with the actor. Similar other reports on sex scandals were revealed but the Bollywood was silent on those scandals. Another example is the report of an investigative news agency “cobra post” which conducted a sting operation-the “Operation Karoke”, on various Bollywood stars, asking them whether the stars would do publicity for the “Bhartiya Janta Party” for various state elections? Most of stars agreed to do that on a paid amount of Rupees 1 crore. These examples demonstrates the avarice of the individual stars who will do anything that fulfils their desires. The same goes with the political parties which tries to use Bollywood for their election propaganda since these Bollywood stars are strongly deified by the people of India and hence easily manipulated.
In the conclusion, through the medium of scandals one can understand the flaws in the current system, whether be it a film industry or a government sector or the government itself. These flaws arises due to incompetency of both the people who doesn’t raise their voice on the wrong as well as the greed and corruption among the government or any film industry.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 236, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...or reformer may though can give a clear a idea about the existing problems in a s...
^
Line 3, column 27, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...;s problem. First of all, scandals are useful to expose the hidden agendas or p...
^^
Line 3, column 588, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'fee', 'feis'?
Suggestion: fee; feis
...ently making profits by charging a huge fees of Rs 50-60 lacs from non-qualified stu...
^^^^
Line 3, column 739, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...rnement and its chief minister who even didnt know that the scams mastermind was thei...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 947, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...ong people is also reflected since they didnt raise their voice until the scam was ex...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 811, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'Most of', you should use 'the' ('Most of the stars') or simply say ''Most stars''.
Suggestion: Most of the stars; Most stars
...arty' for various state elections? Most of stars agreed to do that on a paid amount of R...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 894, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'demonstrate'.
Suggestion: demonstrate
...mount of Rupees 1 crore. These examples demonstrates the avarice of the individual stars who...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 194, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'arise'.
Suggestion: arise
...r or the government itself. These flaws arises due to incompetency of both the people ...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 288, Rule ID: BOTH_AS_WELL_AS[1]
Message: Probable usage error. Use 'and' after 'both'.
Suggestion: and
...n't raise their voice on the wrong as well as the greed and corruption among the gove...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, may, so, still, well, as to, for example, as well as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.4196629213 48% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 14.8657303371 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.3162921348 141% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 33.0505617978 100% => OK
Preposition: 67.0 58.6224719101 114% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 12.9106741573 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2710.0 2235.4752809 121% => OK
No of words: 521.0 442.535393258 118% => OK
Chars per words: 5.20153550864 5.05705443957 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.77759609229 4.55969084622 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.0423748276 2.79657885939 109% => OK
Unique words: 270.0 215.323595506 125% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.518234165067 0.4932671777 105% => OK
syllable_count: 838.8 704.065955056 119% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 23.0359550562 117% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.828197383 60.3974514979 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 142.631578947 118.986275619 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.4210526316 23.4991977007 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.47368421053 5.21951772744 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 7.80617977528 115% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 10.2758426966 58% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 5.13820224719 214% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0847515042966 0.243740707755 35% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0298574549999 0.0831039109588 36% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.032853899579 0.0758088955206 43% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0574124883261 0.150359130593 38% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0420796021057 0.0667264976115 63% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.8 14.1392134831 119% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 48.8420337079 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.1743820225 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.18 12.1639044944 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.13 8.38706741573 109% => OK
difficult_words: 137.0 100.480337079 136% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 11.8971910112 118% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.2143820225 114% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.7820224719 119% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.