Young people should be encouraged to pursue long-term, realistic goals rather than seek immediate fame and recognition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
Perhaps one of the most unique motifs learned from previous generations is to be conservative and risk averse. Our grandparents grew up in an era characterized by arranged marriages, the military draft and a unique interpretation of what is considered normal by society. Conversely, our era is defined by disrupting societal norms and resetting the paradigm of society. Life is short, and people should not sit idly and accept what is adequate; we should be driven for excellence.
The prompt encourages our youth to work towards realistic goals that will establish one's future. This is counterintuitive to human nature. Most, if not all, people strive for similar things: we want to be recognized, we wanted to leave a legacy and we want power. To accept realistic goals is to cede to mediocrity. For instance, take the Oklahoma City Thunder head coach Billy Donovan. Once he graduated from college, he accepted a job working on Wall Street to appease his parents. Realizing his true passion, he quit and ended up in an assistant coach position for Marshall. He worked his way up to a head coach position, establishing a winning culture and eventually making his way to the University of Florida. There, he would make the NCAA tournament numerous times and winning the national championship twice in a row. Today, he is a promising coach for a playoff bound franchise in the NBA. Life should not be a cycle of just running through the motions; embrace the challenge of following your dreams and achieving improbable goals.
Furthermore, if culture dismisses those who seek out their aspirations, where would our artists go? Artists, writers, athletes - these occupations are some of the most challenging fields to break into. Jean-Michel Basquiat was a young, black artist aspiring to make a living off of his passions. His confound art was incomparable to any predecessors. Today, he is known as one of the greatest contemporary artists of all time. Being a minority in a race-stricken time, his success was not granted. Hard-work, vigor and tenacity led him to greatness. Had Basquiat not tenaciously pursued art, he could have left this world unbeknownst to others.
One of the most well known aphorisms is: "Luck is when hard work meets opportunity." People are motivated by their interests. True innovators have a passion so intense that they can't refrain from studying religiously, completely engulfing their life in their goals. For instance, Warren Buffet had such a fervor for picking stocks that he rushed through college because it got in the way of his dream. Had Buffet been encouraged to set realistic goals, he might be an accountant. Innovation is led by those who set unthinkable goals. Elon Musk was sued by NASA because he intended to privatize space travel. NASA was underfunded and Musk understood that the space industry was not evolving. His company, SpaceX, now sits alone at the top of the industry. Unrealistic goals are only unbelievable until they are achieved.
Dreams, passions and aspirations should never be tempered. Goals should be met with glut; we should strive to overachieve. Perhaps Kanye West said it best: "Shoot for the stars, and if you fall, you will land on the clouds." Setting realistic goals creates a society of diffidents, and it is imperative to foster learning and innovation.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 20, Rule ID: VERY_UNIQUE[1]
Message: Use simply 'unique'.
Suggestion: unique
Perhaps one of the most unique motifs learned from previous generation...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 85, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...rds realistic goals that will establish ones future. This is counterintuitive to hum...
^^^^
Line 5, column 152, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...iters, athletes - these occupations are some of the most challenging fields to break into. ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 189, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ors have a passion so intense that they cant refrain from studying religiously, comp...
^^^^
Line 9, column 151, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'bests', 'wells'?
Suggestion: bests; wells
...overachieve. Perhaps Kanye West said it best: 'Shoot for the stars, and if you ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
conversely, furthermore, if, so, well, for instance
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.5258426966 164% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.4196629213 97% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 14.8657303371 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.3162921348 71% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 51.0 33.0505617978 154% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 63.0 58.6224719101 107% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 12.9106741573 70% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2811.0 2235.4752809 126% => OK
No of words: 550.0 442.535393258 124% => OK
Chars per words: 5.11090909091 5.05705443957 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84273464058 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.98365060647 2.79657885939 107% => OK
Unique words: 316.0 215.323595506 147% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.574545454545 0.4932671777 116% => OK
syllable_count: 859.5 704.065955056 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 18.0 6.24550561798 288% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 1.0 0.740449438202 135% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.38483146067 23% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 35.0 20.2370786517 173% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 23.0359550562 65% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.4800518371 60.3974514979 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 80.3142857143 118.986275619 67% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.7142857143 23.4991977007 67% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.45714285714 5.21951772744 28% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 7.80617977528 64% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 23.0 10.2758426966 224% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.83258426966 207% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.13693676437 0.243740707755 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0318120360754 0.0831039109588 38% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0396886533148 0.0758088955206 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0843975160434 0.150359130593 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.055051943862 0.0667264976115 83% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 14.1392134831 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.25 48.8420337079 115% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.06 12.1639044944 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.06 8.38706741573 108% => OK
difficult_words: 163.0 100.480337079 162% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 11.8971910112 76% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.2143820225 71% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.