The bar chart below shows the results of survey conducted by a personnel department at a major company. The survey was carried out on a 2 groups of workers:those aged from 18- 30 and those aged 45-60 ,and shows factors affecting their work performance.

Essay topics:

The bar chart below shows the results of survey conducted by a personnel department at a major company. The survey was carried out on a 2 groups of workers:those aged from 18- 30 and those aged 45-60 ,and shows factors affecting their work performance.

The horizontal graph illustrates the information about the results of survey conducted by a personnel department at a major company, and this survey was carried out two groups of workers:those aged from 18-30 ,and those aged from 45-60, and depicts factors affecting their work performance.

These factors are divided into internal , and external factors . The internal factors are team spirit, competent boss,respect fom cooleagues, and job satisfaction . The internal factors are chance for personal develpment, promotion prospects , and money.

On the internal factors of team spirit have similar near about 60 portion of both two groups, and competent boss have 49 share of aged 18- 30 ,and 50 petcentage of 45 -60 year. However, job security ,and job sstisfaction of work performance by required of 40 and 20 , and 50 ,49 are both aged respectively.

In the external factors of chance for personal development in 18-30 from 85 portion , and in 45-60 age have 40 percentage , and both aged have similar percentage of work environment . Furthermore, money work performanc in both aged to similar percentsgs.

Overall , it is evident that the internal factor have similar responses from two ages group . While , they had dissimilar responses on the external factor.

Votes
Average: 7.8 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 209, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... groups of workers:those aged from 18-30 ,and those aged from 45-60, and depicts f...
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Line 3, column 40, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... These factors are divided into internal , and external factors . The internal fac...
^^
Line 3, column 63, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ded into internal , and external factors . The internal factors are team spirit, c...
^^
Line 3, column 118, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , respect
... factors are team spirit, competent boss,respect fom cooleagues, and job satisfaction . ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 163, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ect fom cooleagues, and job satisfaction . The internal factors are chance for per...
^^
Line 3, column 242, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...personal develpment, promotion prospects , and money. On the internal factors o...
^^
Line 5, column 142, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...petent boss have 49 share of aged 18- 30 ,and 50 petcentage of 45 -60 year. Howe...
^^
Line 5, column 164, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...are of aged 18- 30 ,and 50 petcentage of 45 -60 year. However, job security ,an...
^^
Line 5, column 172, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ged 18- 30 ,and 50 petcentage of 45 -60 year. However, job security ,and job ss...
^^
Line 5, column 192, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...etcentage of 45 -60 year. However, job security ,and job sstisfaction of work p...
^^
Line 5, column 202, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...of 45 -60 year. However, job security ,and job sstisfaction of work performance...
^^
Line 5, column 269, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ork performance by required of 40 and 20 , and 50 ,49 are both aged respectively. ...
^^
Line 5, column 278, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...rmance by required of 40 and 20 , and 50 ,49 are both aged respectively. In the...
^^
Line 7, column 84, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...nal development in 18-30 from 85 portion , and in 45-60 age have 40 percentage , ...
^^
Line 7, column 99, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... in 18-30 from 85 portion , and in 45-60 age have 40 percentage , and both aged ...
^^
Line 7, column 123, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...n , and in 45-60 age have 40 percentage , and both aged have similar percentage ...
^^
Line 7, column 129, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d in 45-60 age have 40 percentage , and both aged have similar percentage of wor...
^^
Line 7, column 184, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...e similar percentage of work environment . Furthermore, money work performanc in b...
^^
Line 9, column 8, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...h aged to similar percentsgs. Overall , it is evident that the internal factor ...
^^
Line 9, column 92, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ve similar responses from two ages group . While , they had dissimilar responses o...
^^
Line 9, column 95, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...similar responses from two ages group . While , they had dissimilar responses on the ...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 100, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ar responses from two ages group . While , they had dissimilar responses on the ex...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, however, so, while

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 7.0 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 6.8 191% => OK
Relative clauses : 1.0 3.15609756098 32% => OK
Pronoun: 8.0 5.60731707317 143% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 29.0 33.7804878049 86% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 3.97073170732 302% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1076.0 965.302439024 111% => OK
No of words: 199.0 196.424390244 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.40703517588 4.92477711251 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.75589349951 3.73543355544 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.99993953076 2.65546596893 113% => OK
Unique words: 114.0 106.607317073 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.572864321608 0.547539520022 105% => OK
syllable_count: 313.2 283.868780488 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.45097560976 110% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 1.53170731707 196% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.33902439024 69% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.07073170732 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 12.0 0.482926829268 2485% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 3.36585365854 59% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 8.94146341463 112% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.4926829268 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 68.9121905036 43.030603864 160% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.6 112.824112599 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.9 22.9334400587 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.1 5.23603664747 59% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 3.83414634146 130% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 22.0 1.69756097561 1296% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 3.70975609756 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.09268292683 122% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.402089090194 0.215688989381 186% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.149180787576 0.103423049105 144% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.188199839929 0.0843802449381 223% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.242244804249 0.15604864568 155% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.228881001917 0.0819641961636 279% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.0 13.2329268293 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 61.2550243902 85% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.3012195122 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.1 11.4140731707 124% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.63 8.06136585366 107% => OK
difficult_words: 51.0 40.7170731707 125% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.4329268293 96% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.9970731707 87% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.0658536585 99% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Maximum four paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.