It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views

Essay topics:

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. -Syerapke- Re-Write

Talent is a blessing that God gives us to do something well. Moreover, some people think that the talent is pertinent with a decent skill such as arts and sports; although it is true, the opponents refute and claim that practices make perfect in order to reach sophisticated skill. In my opinion, both of them should be given importance and cannot mutually exclusive.

Firstly, talent could be stance as a pathway to get proficiency. For instance, Fatin Shidqia is an Indonesian female singer which is given this prime aptitude by the almighty. Moreover, her unique voice astonished many people and took her as X Factor Indonesia champions. It is because she is able to sing well even though she was untrained schoolchildren with nothing such facilities incompletely.

On the other hand, some groups believe that tremendous practices are the step to be skilful. Hence, not only people with ability can gain proficiency but also disabled people, too; Hellen Keller as such example. Caging in deafness, blindness, and mute cannot limit her to be well-known orator. Thus, the former example is keen to justified that there is no limitation for someone owns when he(she) has a big determination to master something.

In my view, talent is really existed in human life, and it takes variation in everyone’s. Unfortunately, people usually unaware what the kind of talent they have and also impacted at inappropriate skill is built. Nevertheless, talent also has major and minor which supported each other. Therefore, improving the minor with sustainability exercise may enclose proficiency in order to people passion.

To sum up, the solid set of talent and practice will be a great mixture for enhancing someone’ Excellency.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)

Comments

talent could be stance as a pathway to get proficiency.
talent could be a stance as a pathway to get proficiency.

even though she was untrained schoolchildren with nothing such facilities incompletely.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?

there is no limitation for someone owns when...
there is no limitation for someone to own when...

people usually unaware what the kind of talent they have
people usually are unaware what the kind of talent they have

may enclose proficiency in order to people passion.
in order to + verb + something

Sentence: Thus, the former example is keen to justified that there is no limitation for someone owns when heshe has a big determination to master something.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to to and justified

Sentence: Thus, the former example is keen to justified that there is no limitation for someone owns when heshe has a big determination to master something.
Error: heshe Suggestion: here

flaws:
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.933 0.12
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2

Read a good grammar book.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 280 350
No. of Characters: 1397 1500
No. of Different Words: 183 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.091 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.989 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.759 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 103 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 70 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.667 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.726 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.933 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.298 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.566 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.076 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

-Syerapke-
even though she was untrained schoolchildren with nothing such facilities incompletely.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?

my second try
Even though she was untrained with such sophisticated facilities, she is able to sing well.

may I get the newest advice Mr. Tesbig ?
thank you