In recent years, there has been growing interest in the relationship between equality and personal achievement. Some people believe that individuals can achieve more in egalitarian societies. Others believe that high levels of personal achievement are possible only if individuals are free to succeed or fail according to their individual merits.
What is your view of the relationship between equality and personal success?
It is commonly recognized that there is a positive relationship between individual development and social equality. Sometimes equal opportunities should be given to everyone in society otherwise some people’s rights would be oppressed. However, I disagree that people gain greater development in an egalitarian world because a society like that is unrealism and ineffective.
To begin with, I totally agree that people in some areas still need to strive for a more equal society. In some countries and places, residents, especially women and children, do not have access to education, workplace or medical system. Governments and international organizations have to build societies with more equality because people need to have those basic rights first, then thinking about personal development and life achievement. On the other hand, the completely equal world is unachievable due to the limited social resources and is not a Utopia due to low efficiency.
It is unfair and ineffective to offer everyone in society with equal opportunities regardless of different levels of their performance. People would become less motivated in this kind of world where they do not need to work hard for a better chance. If you can go to any university without an outstanding academic performance, why would you need to study at school and struggle to develop yourself? It is not rewarding any more to receive an education if anyone can have a decent job. So an extremely equal society is no good to people’s personal achievement and even might be a barrier for the development of the whole society.
In conclusion, we need equality to achieve personal goals, but it is not realism to have a fully equal world now and it could be bad for personal performance in that society. I believe limited opportunities are the motivation for people to struggle forward.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 250, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to forward'
Suggestion: to forward
...e the motivation for people to struggle forward.
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, so, still, then, in conclusion, kind of, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 13.1623246493 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 7.85571142285 165% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 10.4138276553 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 24.0651302605 87% => OK
Preposition: 39.0 41.998997996 93% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.3376753507 144% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1563.0 1615.20841683 97% => OK
No of words: 300.0 315.596192385 95% => OK
Chars per words: 5.21 5.12529762239 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.16179145029 4.20363070211 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.06104375808 2.80592935109 109% => OK
Unique words: 165.0 176.041082164 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.55 0.561755894193 98% => OK
syllable_count: 515.7 506.74238477 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 31.2237644974 49.4020404114 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.642857143 106.682146367 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.4285714286 20.7667163134 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.0 7.06120827912 99% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.67935871743 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.9879759519 125% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.262560335938 0.244688304435 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0848782640401 0.084324248473 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0531234362248 0.0667982634062 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.161561002711 0.151304729494 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0343710481525 0.056905535591 60% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 13.0946893788 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 50.2224549098 83% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 11.3001002004 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.94 12.4159519038 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.47 8.58950901804 99% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 78.4519038076 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 9.78957915832 107% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.