Nowadays, we have entered a brand-new era and thanks to the development of the media, there are always different attitudes towards the same issue. Recently, an increasing number of people are concerned about the debate on if it is necessary for younger school children to learn art and music in addition to math and other academic subjects. Some argue that studying music and art is of no use for children because they should learn more knowledge relating to academic. However, from my personal perspective, I shall lay my preference of standpoint on that younger children are ought to learn art and music expect from math, languages classes because of the following reasons.
Firstly, studying art and music enables children to expand their social circle. There is no doubt to say that the more interests the children have, the more opportunities they have to meet with new people. For example, by studying music, children may make friends with others who speak the same language as them and make an appointment to go to listen to a concert together after the class. They will talk a lot about not only the concert, but also other things, and thus they may get along well with each other for a long period. By this means, children get more chance to communicate with others and gradually, their social skills are improved. Therefore, children who learn art and music as interests will be more likely to have more friends, comparing those who only learn math, languages and history at school, which is also beneficial for their future.
What’s more, it is helpful for children to relax. In the modern society, not only adults are under too much pressure, but children are as well. According to a recent survey released by the world health organization, 43.4% of the younger children are facing certain mental probelems due to the pressure of schoolwork. For instance, the pressure of getting higher score, the pressure of going into a better primary school and etc. Children have been exhausted to try their best on the class such as math, languages, science and history, while they hardly have time to relax, even though a short rest. By learning some subjects, in which score is not necessary, such as art and music, children are literated from pressure for a while. For instance, children will feel relaxed after listening to a soft song, and also they will get enough energy to study other subjects. Moreover, they may find it easy to concentrate on studying after relaxing for a while, which is beneficial to improve their studying efficiency.
Admittedly, learning art and music may occupy the time spending on the academic subjects, which means that children would have less time to study math, history, science. However, in my personal opinion, the priority should be given to the health when camparing to study since nobody is able to finish their work perfectly without a good condition of mental health.
After analyzing all the pros and cons from multiple aspects, we may now, can reach the conclusion confidently that, younger children are ought to learn art and music in addition to the ordinary subjects, such as history and math.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 295, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e facing certain mental probelems due to the pressure of schoolwork. For instance...
^^
Line 3, column 428, Rule ID: AND_ETC[1]
Message: Use simply 'etc.'.
Suggestion: etc.
...e of going into a better primary school and etc. Children have been exhausted to try the...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 186, Rule ID: PERSONAL_OPINION_FRIENDSHIP[1]
Message: Use simply 'opinion'.
Suggestion: opinion
... math, history, science. However, in my personal opinion, the priority should be given to the he...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, may, moreover, so, therefore, thus, well, while, for example, for instance, in addition, no doubt, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 43.0788530466 70% => OK
Preposition: 71.0 52.1666666667 136% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2624.0 1977.66487455 133% => OK
No of words: 531.0 407.700716846 130% => OK
Chars per words: 4.94161958569 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.80035803286 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51628802974 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 258.0 212.727598566 121% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.485875706215 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 800.1 618.680645161 129% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 44.4135380067 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.952380952 100.406767564 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.2857142857 20.6045352989 123% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.95238095238 5.45110844103 128% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.267768479635 0.236089414692 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0893410460821 0.076458572812 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.062277509026 0.0737576698707 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.172830787721 0.150856017488 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0366336618378 0.0645574589148 57% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 11.7677419355 123% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 58.1214874552 94% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.67 10.9000537634 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.88 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 86.8835125448 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.