Directions Read the question below Give yourself 30 minutes to plan write and revise your essay Typically an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words Reading Time 30 minutes Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Tele | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

Essay topics:

Directions: Read the question below. Give yourself 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your
essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words.

Reading Time: 30 minutes

Question: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

Television advertising directed toward young children
(aged two to five) should not be allowed.

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Television advertising has become important aspect of marketing for all of the companies. Regardless of products that companies sell, marketing of these products can be done effectively through television advertising. In my opinion, such kind of advertising directed towards young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed due to following two reasons.
First of all, children of such tender age don’t have much understanding of the world. They easily believe what they see and such kind of impression is imprinted on their mind. Even though, children of this age are the major consumer base for few products but ultimately their parents are the ones who will be making the purchase and not the children themselves. Children in such age may see something shown in the television advertisement and may pursue their parents of buying such products in the hope that whatever fantasy world shown in the advertisement may come true with them also. However, a decision for purchase shall be based on the requirement and other important aspects of the product and not on the promise of some dream, fantasy world coming true.
Secondly, in case if parents of children buy the product and it does not perform as per satisfaction of the child or it does not turn like the fantasy world shown in the advertisement, then children are likely to develop problems of trust issues. They will be skeptical about all the things that they see and it will be difficult for them to look at the world as a safe and nurturing space in opposition to the evil,lying world that they see. Such trauma developed in early stage may cause problems in their adult life as well.
Therefore, I think that such advertisement directed towards the younger audience shall not be allowed since it takes away right of the parents to make a well thought purchase for their children and disappointment resulting from not fulfillment of lies of the advertisement may adversely affect their children’s mental health.

Votes

Essay Categories

Independent TOEFL Writing

Comments

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 69, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...ecome important aspect of marketing for all of the companies. Regardless of products that ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 583, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
...e advertisement may come true with them also. However, a decision for purchase shall...
^^^^
Line 3, column 415, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , lying
...urturing space in opposition to the evil,lying world that they see. Such trauma develo...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, look, may, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, well, i think, kind of, first of all, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 27.0 43.0788530466 63% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 52.1666666667 86% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1657.0 1977.66487455 84% => OK
No of words: 332.0 407.700716846 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.99096385542 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.2685907696 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79448442459 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 173.0 212.727598566 81% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.521084337349 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 499.5 618.680645161 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 20.6003584229 58% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 73.1225664362 48.9658058833 149% => OK
Chars per sentence: 138.083333333 100.406767564 138% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.6666666667 20.6045352989 134% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.0 5.45110844103 202% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0245197054508 0.236089414692 10% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0100202450041 0.076458572812 13% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0115175990233 0.0737576698707 16% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0182627451854 0.150856017488 12% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.00842952572666 0.0645574589148 13% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.9 11.7677419355 135% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 10.1575268817 124% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.96 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.02 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 64.0 86.8835125448 74% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.