Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

In today's complicated and interconnected world we live in, the subject of privacy plays a vital role in everybody's lives. Some people believe that we should know anything about famous actors and athletes, especially their private issues. I personally, on the other hand, think that their privacy should be noticed and respected due to two significant reasons which I will explain in the following paragraphs.
First and foremost, all human beings including the more well-known entertainers and sport champions need to live in a calm and serenity situation without any disturbance caused by others. Media and other people who try to violate their privacy, deprive them from being calm resulting in a worse mental health for those famous individuals. My cousin example is a good illustration of this concept. She used to take pictures of her favorite movie star, even when that star was going out with his family to take vacation. Consequently, the movie player notices she was doing harm to him, and later he pursued her legally through courts causing her serious consequences. Had she not violated his privacy, he would not have accused her of taking his serenity moments away when they were out with his family. Therefore, respecting other people's privacies, especially famous ones, is a must we should consider and revere.
Last but not least, keeping personal privacy is third essential human needs in Maslow's hierarchical needs. Accordingly, it is important to pay attention to it because it is a crucial one everyone requires, with no exception to well-known athletes and performers. According to Maslow's hierarchical needs, we have some basic needs and some others who are based on them. Privacy plays a critical role in this regard which should be considered to help people live better and trust each other. For instance, when someone doesn’t look on my cellphone, I can easily do my own tasks without any inconveniences of others. Nevertheless, when someone tries to take a look at what I am doing or playing or what applications I have installed, he or she makes me nervous leading me to look strangely to whoever does so and to keep my personal distance from him or her. This is true for famous persons as well. So, this example demonstrates how it is crucial to pay close attention to people's essential needs containing their privacies.
To put it all in a nutshell, taking all the aforementioned reasons and examples into account, I am of opinion that famous person's privacy should be revered. Not only does everyone need to lead a calm life, but also privacy is a critical needs of all human beings which should be respected.

Average: 9 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 123, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's account, I am of opinion that famous persons privacy should be revered. Not only doe...
Line 4, column 238, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'need'?
Suggestion: need
...lm life, but also privacy is a critical needs of all human beings which should be res...

Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, consequently, first, if, look, nevertheless, so, therefore, third, well, for instance, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 13.8261648746 145% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 43.0788530466 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2204.0 1977.66487455 111% => OK
No of words: 442.0 407.700716846 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98642533937 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58517132086 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80253463216 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 246.0 212.727598566 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.556561085973 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 682.2 618.680645161 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.6844095556 48.9658058833 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.2 100.406767564 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.4 5.45110844103 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.139842948651 0.236089414692 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0405474358495 0.076458572812 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0206157847428 0.0737576698707 28% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0825662968387 0.150856017488 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0122435634311 0.0645574589148 19% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 11.7677419355 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.66 10.9000537634 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.51 8.01818996416 106% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 86.8835125448 122% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.