Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
It is undeniable that the support from the government is essential for any field, since it enhances its opportunity of success. It is common for people to have different opinions about where governmental support has to go. For me, I belive that there has to be more financial support toward the arts than for athletics. I think this way for two reasons, which I am going to explain in the following essay.
First, government support is a right for all people, so if it goes to athletics such as state-sponored olympic teams, that means it will help only certain kind of people, who are intrested in olympic games. However, arts have many categories, for example, music, acting, singing and a lot of other types that are hard to mention them here. Therefore, supporting arts means that the government is serving all the community rather than specific population. For instance, last year, our art college recieved a huge financial help from the government in term of youth dreams support. Many student benefited from that support not only the art students. My friend susan is a medical school student. she is very smart and hard working person, but at the same time she is very sensitive and emotional. What I remembered about her that she was very excited about that support. Actually she applied that year to be part of one of the music teams that got the support, and surprisingly, she was accepted. By that attendance, she achieved one of her dreams, which is to be a pianist.
Second, arts are a way to participate in many international events. supporting those events is crucial to maintaine our country position in front of the world. back to my friend susan, her team used the support from the government to improve their abilities and skills. they participated in the international music competition, and because of their hard working and the country by their side, they won and went back with the golden cup.
To sum up, I strongly believe that goverments should spend more mony in support of arts than in support of athletics not only because they can serve higher number of people, but also they can achieve a lot of international prizes with their arts teams.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 172, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
... will help only certain kind of people, who are intrested in olympic games. However, ar...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 580, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun student seems to be countable; consider using: 'Many students'.
Suggestion: Many students
...rnment in term of youth dreams support. Many student benefited from that support not only th...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 693, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: She
...iend susan is a medical school student. she is very smart and hard working person, ...
^^^
Line 3, column 68, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Supporting
...rticipate in many international events. supporting those events is crucial to maintaine ou...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 160, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Back
...country position in front of the world. back to my friend susan, her team used the s...
^^^^
Line 3, column 270, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
... to improve their abilities and skills. they participated in the international music...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, however, if, second, so, therefore, as to, for example, for instance, i think, kind of, such as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 48.0 43.0788530466 111% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1799.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 375.0 407.700716846 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.79733333333 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40055868397 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67335960087 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 212.727598566 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.528 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 552.6 618.680645161 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.9864586411 48.9658058833 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.6842105263 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.7368421053 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.05263157895 5.45110844103 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309058252775 0.236089414692 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0922511442905 0.076458572812 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.071824914961 0.0737576698707 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.186331826977 0.150856017488 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0415722663215 0.0645574589148 64% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.56 10.9000537634 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.74 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 75.0 86.8835125448 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.