It is obvious in today’s fast-paced world, with the development of technology, children have access to various devices such as video games, smart phones, computers, and so on for pleasure and amusement. I believe that it is much beneficial for children to spend their time with their friends and to play with them instead of using advanced devices. in the following paragraphs, I will discuss my view using some reasons and examples.
I think if children play with their friends, it will give them a good opportunity to improve their social relationships. Also, they are able to make new friends and develop their friendships with others. They will learn how to treat with others and it helps them to have enough abilitiy to communicate with others when they will grow up and become older, while using tools like computer and smart phone will not provide this great opportunity for them. as a result, it is much better for them to play with their friend rather than relying on the these devices. for instance, my son often play with his friends and is not interested in these devices. thus, he has many good friends who help his in his homework, and he has learned a lot of useful things from them.
Moreover, I believe that depending on these devices will prevent children from having physical activities which would be harmful for their health. Using these devices will lead them to sit and stare to computer monitor or cell phone playing different games; consequently, it will cause them to suffer from different dieseases such as obesity or to feel much pain in their eyes. Moreover, it will waste their time, and they cannot concentrate on their school work. For example, my friend’s daughter has not any friend and always is involved in playing games in her smart phone. Hence, she suffers from obesity and also she is shy and cannot communicate with her pioneers well.
To sum up, in my point of view, playing with friends not only would be enjoyable for childen but also would enhance their social relationships. In addition, it will be useful for their health.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: In
...them instead of using advanced devices. in the following paragraphs, I will discus...
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...rovide this great opportunity for them. as a result, it is much better for them to...
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...ther than relying on the these devices. for instance, my son often play with his fr...
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Suggestion: Thus
...and is not interested in these devices. thus, he has many good friends who help his ...
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Line 3, column 79, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...these devices will prevent children from having physical activities which would b...
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Suggestion:
...on, it will be useful for their health.
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, hence, if, moreover, so, thus, well, while, for example, for instance, i think, in addition, such as, as a result, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 56.0 43.0788530466 130% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 49.0 52.1666666667 94% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1728.0 1977.66487455 87% => OK
No of words: 357.0 407.700716846 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.84033613445 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34677393335 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.5255918496 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 181.0 212.727598566 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.50700280112 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 507.6 618.680645161 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.5204949996 48.9658058833 111% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.0 100.406767564 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3125 20.6045352989 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.3125 5.45110844103 171% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.300423335294 0.236089414692 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.121480346566 0.076458572812 159% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0821616021525 0.0737576698707 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.216641636975 0.150856017488 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.035267036358 0.0645574589148 55% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 11.7677419355 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 58.1214874552 114% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.09 10.9000537634 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.43 8.01818996416 93% => OK
difficult_words: 61.0 86.8835125448 70% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 63.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.