Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, most of the countries want to promote their community level in the future by their people. So, to reach this, people have to learn a few skills and be accomplished in their jobs. In this regard, they must start from initial years of their life learning skills. While someone declares that children should not work, and childhood in the time that they usually play with toys, but my viewpoint is reverse, I believe parents should prepare their childeren for adulthood by encouraging them to take a job. In what follows, I will substantiate my reasons.
Firstly, parents can encourage their childeren to have a part time job because they can learn a few skills that they can use in the future. So, when they will be a young person, the community can benefit from them in the factories or other companies. Moreover, they can be self-sufficent person since they were a teenager. For example, I had a friend in highschool, and he was working in the summer when the school was closed. last year, he had a good recomandation from his boss, and it gave rise to find a professional job in the apple company with high salary. But, I was trying to play with Playstation in the summer when I was teenager. Now, I cannot find a professional job related my experience. So, if parents encourage their children to take a job, they will be a successful person in the future.
Secondly, children can work when they are so young, and it can help family income. Although it will have a little rise in the purchase power of family, children can pay for their education equipments. For instance, my father tell me about his young period when he worked for a mechanic. His father was not wealthy person.So, he had to work to by his book, and my grandfather could buy meat, diary, rice. and so forth instead of paying for my father's book. Thus, if the teenagers take a part-time job, it will result in their responsiblity in the community.
To conclude, childeren can work since they were teenager, and not only it will bring about success for children, but it will also improve their responsibility in society.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 58, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...can encourage their childeren to have a part time job because they can learn a few skills...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 427, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Last
... the summer when the school was closed. last year, he had a good recomandation from ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 321, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: So
...anic. His father was not wealthy person.So, he had to work to by his book, and my ...
^^
Line 3, column 404, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: And
...randfather could buy meat, diary, rice. and so forth instead of paying for my fathe...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, thus, while, for example, for instance
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 9.8082437276 214% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 54.0 43.0788530466 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 44.0 52.1666666667 84% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1732.0 1977.66487455 88% => OK
No of words: 371.0 407.700716846 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.66846361186 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38877662729 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67096999013 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 185.0 212.727598566 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.498652291105 0.524837075471 95% => OK
syllable_count: 522.0 618.680645161 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 9.0 1.86738351254 482% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.9230415977 48.9658058833 88% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.6 100.406767564 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.55 20.6045352989 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.05 5.45110844103 93% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.221816175608 0.236089414692 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0745631523635 0.076458572812 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0678579188577 0.0737576698707 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141446026354 0.150856017488 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0372631166171 0.0645574589148 58% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.8 11.7677419355 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 58.1214874552 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.1575268817 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.81 10.9000537634 90% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.47 8.01818996416 93% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 86.8835125448 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 63.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.