Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer
Being prosperous in life and earns high wages are efforts that motivate people to struggle in their lives. Different people use different approaches to be successful. Where some people depend on their ties with some influential people, others solely trusted their hard work. If I were asked, I would definitely say that working hard would have a significant effect on a student’s life that leads him to success. My firm belief in this is for a number of reasons which I will explore in the subsequent paragraph.
The first reason coming to mind to elucidate my standpoint is associated with the reality that working strenuously creates perseverance in hard workers, so they have multiple ways to use their knowledge. They trust their abilities and know that their efforts would have profound effects on their lives. On the contrary, people who are just dependent on others can not adjust to deviation and, as a result, failed in their life. I have to admit that my opinion on this matter has been profoundly influenced by my brother’s experience. He was working as an electrical engineer in a firm. His company had to go through financial crises. As a result, they laid off many workers and assigned different jobs to the remaining workers. My brother was assigned a job that is out of his field, but he endured as he was certain that he would manage that. He proved his worth, whereas his boss relative had to lose his job as he could not fulfill the duties. If he had the habit of working hard and not only realizing on relations, he would have sustained his jobs too.
The second rationale behind this opinion is rooted in the fact hard workers can develop an unperishable connection with their employers. As they prove their worth through hard work and thus gain their employer’s trust. Research has proven that people who depend on their relationships are those who are idle and unproductive. Even if they use their ties, it would not help them be successful in their jobs in the long run. Drawing from my experience, Five years ago, when I graduated, I was the top achiever of my batch and therefore got a job instantly in a well-known pharmaceutical company. To my wonder, one of my colleagues was my old classmate, who was an idler and below-average student but got hired by the company because of his personal ties. Unfortunately, he could not prove his competency and fired from the job just after a couple of months. It is certainly clear to see that a hard worker wins the race and sustains his position in front of his employers.
In light of the above-mentioned reasons, I strongly believe that hard work is the only key to success which not guide them with the multi-dimensional road of success but also strengthens their working relationship in the future.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 28, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'mind elucidating'.
Suggestion: mind elucidating
...aragraph. The first reason coming to mind to elucidate my standpoint is associated with the re...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, then, therefore, thus, well, whereas, as a result, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 11.0286738351 181% => OK
Pronoun: 77.0 43.0788530466 179% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2310.0 1977.66487455 117% => OK
No of words: 482.0 407.700716846 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.79253112033 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68556276237 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79896357061 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 244.0 212.727598566 115% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.50622406639 0.524837075471 96% => OK
syllable_count: 697.5 618.680645161 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.5127155888 48.9658058833 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.25 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0833333333 20.6045352989 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.16666666667 5.45110844103 76% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.115932228258 0.236089414692 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0372313223386 0.076458572812 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0250463107033 0.0737576698707 34% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0846136521416 0.150856017488 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0172456431377 0.0645574589148 27% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.2 11.7677419355 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 68.1 58.1214874552 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.5 10.9000537634 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.36 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 86.8835125448 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.