Do you agree or disagree with the following statement When people succeed it is entirely because of hard work Luck has nothing to do with their success Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position

Essay topics:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? “When people succeed, it is entirely because of hard work. Luck has nothing to do with their success.” Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position.

Since prehistoric times, luck and religion was the hot issue of human’s activities including satisfactory and evil ones. Personally, I believe that luck may interfere with the people’s process of succeeding but in a negative way. I feel this way for two main reasons, and I will develop these ideas in the subsequent paragraphs unbiasedly because I am the atheist.

Firstly, people who depend on their luck rather than their own ability to accomplish matters tend to be less assiduous than others who realize that they cannot achieve their goal without tackling. This is because they consider that luck but not their own skill will perform everything for them, which will probably discourage them. To illustrate this, I would like to share my friend’s experience. Last year, I and my companion were going to take general exams of universities of Mongolia, which is my native country. However, he did not prepare for the test because he was confident about the fact that god will help him on the test day. Needless to say, he failed the test and end up losing opportunity to studying higher education. On the other hand, I recognized that I but not supernatural force was charge in my life, thus I had persisted and studied every subject until the test day. As a result of this, I achieved high score in the test without receiving any message from the god, and guessing any answer. Drawing from my own experience, people will be motivated if they are aware of the fact that only their commitment but not external and abstract force will decide whether they will succeed.

Secondly, people who believe deity, or luck tend to pray for a long time, which means the amount of time expended for working and studying diminishes. To be more specific, some people frequently go to church while others including their competitors are striving. For example, two years ago, my sister went to China for religious purpose for a month because she wanted ask god to help her to succeed in mathematics competition. Unfortunately, her classmates, can constitutes competitors in this case, were developing themselves by practicing throughout the month during which my sister was traveling in order to meet with the god. Eventually, on her test day, she failed to solve problems that was taught when she was absent from class. Therefore, she ends up getting inadequate scores on the competition while her classmates get the first place and golden medal. If she had not stopped rehearsing in order to pray, she would have received better scores than she actually did.

In conclusion, I am of the opinion of luck will even reduce people’s chance of obtaining what they want or aim. This is because they will lose their motivation and invaluable time, which are essential factors of success.

Votes
Average: 7.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 212, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a negative way" with adverb for "negative"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... the people’s process of succeeding but in a negative way. I feel this way for two main reasons, ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 366, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hs unbiasedly because I am the atheist. Firstly, people who depend on their luck...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 463, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[2]
Message: The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: 'constitute'
Suggestion: constitute
...ion. Unfortunately, her classmates, can constitutes competitors in this case, were developi...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 977, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ed better scores than she actually did. In conclusion, I am of the opinion of l...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, firstly, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, while, for example, i feel, in conclusion, as a result, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 63.0 43.0788530466 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 57.0 52.1666666667 109% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2317.0 1977.66487455 117% => OK
No of words: 469.0 407.700716846 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.94029850746 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65364457471 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69192446523 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 261.0 212.727598566 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.556503198294 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 711.9 618.680645161 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 33.1316346627 48.9658058833 68% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.333333333 100.406767564 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3333333333 20.6045352989 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.66666666667 5.45110844103 141% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.113509324617 0.236089414692 48% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0361580624724 0.076458572812 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0387221241102 0.0737576698707 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0813676777065 0.150856017488 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.016569606878 0.0645574589148 26% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.67 10.9000537634 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.57 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 86.8835125448 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.