Do you agree or disagree that it is important to increase the time primary school students spend on technologies such as computers through reducing the time taken up by art and music courses?
As life speeds up, the sand in the hourglass seems to decrease. It is, therefore, necessary that people focus on building the right skills for the future at an earlier and earlier age, also with the rapid development of the modern society, it is much more beneficial that if students spend time on technologies than in others art and music courses.
Firstly, nowadays more and more things are applied with technology and it appears in our daily life from household appliances to our transportations, therefore, it is somehow important and useful for not only students but also people all over the world that it is a way to gain some knowledge and learn some skills of this aspects.
Secondly, it is essential and beneficial for students to develop such right skills, especially at an earlier age. Compared to art and music courses with technology-orientation related courses, it doesn’t mean that the former one is worse useful than the latter one, but when it mentioned about the practicality, it is apparent that the technology-orientation related courses are more useful than the other one.
In short, I think to increase the time spend on technologies is important for all human beings, due to the quick changes in our environment it is good for us to adapt ourselves to the changes.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 319, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...some knowledge and learn some skills of this aspects. Secondly, it is essential an...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, i think, in short
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 9.8082437276 0% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 43.0788530466 51% => OK
Preposition: 28.0 52.1666666667 54% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1081.0 1977.66487455 55% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 218.0 407.700716846 53% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.95871559633 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.84250218741 4.48103885553 86% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.15829602289 2.67179642975 118% => OK
Unique words: 121.0 212.727598566 57% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.55504587156 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 335.7 618.680645161 54% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 6.0 20.6003584229 29% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 36.0 20.1344086022 179% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 99.7028919674 48.9658058833 204% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 180.166666667 100.406767564 179% => OK
Words per sentence: 36.3333333333 20.6045352989 176% => OK
Discourse Markers: 13.5 5.45110844103 248% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.191027454669 0.236089414692 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0886093295094 0.076458572812 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0426376200685 0.0737576698707 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.1148914483 0.150856017488 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0403181513036 0.0645574589148 62% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 20.1 11.7677419355 171% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.4 58.1214874552 75% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.2 10.1575268817 159% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.08 10.9000537634 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.83 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 47.0 86.8835125448 54% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 10.002688172 190% => OK
gunning_fog: 16.4 10.0537634409 163% => OK
text_standard: 19.0 10.247311828 185% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
More content wanted.
Minimum 250 words wanted.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.