If you were given some financial support to start a business, what business would you start? Use speciific reasosn and examples
In the contemporary world, the government and corporate organization’s are funding people to encourage their innovative thoughts and entrepreneurship. If I were supported financially for business, I would start the stem cell storage company. I fell this way for two reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
First of all, stem cells save people from life-threatening diseases such as cancer, genetic disorders, and infectious diseases. This life-saving treatment is mandatory to the nation, these diseases are common in the United States. My personal experience is a good example for illustrating this. when I lived in Florida, my daughter, whose name is Anny, diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder called neoplastic anemia, which means the gradual decline of red blood cells. The physician was asked me about her stem cells for treatment, but I don’t preserve it. As a result, the physician started alternative treatment dialysis, and its function is to filter the blood. the treatment process is expensive, and it needs to continue for life-long.
In addition, to protect lives from deadly diseases, Stem cells preservation is a profitable business because limited people are doing stem cell preservation in selected locations. If I were started this business in a non-competitive rural location, I should get more profit. My classmate Alex is a good example of this. When he was studying college, he started his own company and the local bank supported him. The location, where he started the stem cell storage company in a small town, there is no competition for him within the fifteen miles. As a result, all the nearby hospitals were purchasing stem cells from his company. What's more, he got profited. For this reason, I do believe in our contemporary world stem cell preservation is a profitable business.
In conclusion, Although some people cast doubt on the accuracy of preservation, I feel that stem cell preservation is an innovation and budding business in the present day. This business is helpful for society by curing diseases and profitable for owners. So, I personally recommend people, who are planning to start a new business.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: When
...s a good example for illustrating this. when I lived in Florida, my daughter, whose ...
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Line 2, column 672, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...nd its function is to filter the blood. the treatment process is expensive, and it ...
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Line 3, column 631, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: What's
...purchasing stem cells from his company. Whats more, he got profited. For this reason,...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, so, i feel, in addition, in conclusion, such as, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 29.0 52.1666666667 56% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 18.0 8.0752688172 223% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1829.0 1977.66487455 92% => OK
No of words: 348.0 407.700716846 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.25574712644 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31911543099 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.13313151331 2.67179642975 117% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 212.727598566 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.57183908046 0.524837075471 109% => OK
syllable_count: 568.8 618.680645161 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 40.3592709089 48.9658058833 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.0952380952 100.406767564 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.5714285714 20.6045352989 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.28571428571 5.45110844103 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.152351997255 0.236089414692 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0533095381517 0.076458572812 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0698791009908 0.0737576698707 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107004421609 0.150856017488 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0454820735464 0.0645574589148 70% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 58.1214874552 95% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.93 10.9000537634 119% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.74 8.01818996416 109% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 86.8835125448 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.