Some lessons for young students 5 8 years old increase their interest to learn by video games but some people believe it will distract young students which idea do you prefer and why

Essay topics:

Some lessons for young students(5-8 years old)increase their interest to learn by video games, but some people believe it will distract young students. which idea do you prefer and why?

Modern young students are eager to play video games for a bunch of reasons. While some lessons for young generations increment the curiosity to learn by video games, other people definitely distract young students. It is so controversial for people to decide a specific conclusion to answer the two ideas. In my view, the interest by young students in video games decreases the concentration to study at home, boosts the knowledge about sensitive content, and obtains a difficulty to make real friends in a school.

To begin with, itching the attention about video games by some lectures make young students low concentration to study at a home. In school, the professor tries to give students assignments to acquire profound knowledge about the last classes. Therefore, students have an obligation to submit them until the due date. However, their motivation to complete homework screws up by the interest to be getting into video games. From this perspective, their grades are gradually getting worse.

Secondly, establishing the curiosity of video games by a lesson provides young students with sensitive materials. In the world of games, people attempt to do anything they want. For example, there are a fair amount of video games to shoot someone and enemies. Moreover, people steal any luxury items from anyone. These contexts produce students a chance to change their habits and attitude toward others. They may be a person who makes all arguments against their professors. In addition, rude arrogance hurts their classmates.

Finally, It would be difficult for young students to create real friends by the inquisitiveness about video games. People who play a game in a home frequently talk with others on the internet. They sometimes attain an opportunity to make an online friend only to play some games with each other. If young children are into a video game, they would be accustom to chat with an online friend. Whenever real friend requests them to hang out with other after classes, they would turn down because they want to go out hunting monsters and saving the earth with the friends on the internet. The action does not propel them to make a real friend in school.

To sum up, there are some adverse effects for young children to be curious about video games by a lecture. I surely believe that it nurtures their tedious focus to study at home, constructs sensitive content to them, and cultivates the difficulties to make friends from scratch.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 209, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'amounts'?
Suggestion: amounts
...hey want. For example, there are a fair amount of video games to shoot someone and ene...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, however, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, while, for example, in addition, in my view, to begin with, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 13.8261648746 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 3.0 11.0286738351 27% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 43.0788530466 56% => OK
Preposition: 78.0 52.1666666667 150% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2067.0 1977.66487455 105% => OK
No of words: 409.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.05378973105 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49708221141 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63041825508 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 213.0 212.727598566 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.520782396088 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 636.3 618.680645161 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 40.9277819254 48.9658058833 84% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.125 100.406767564 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.0416666667 20.6045352989 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.79166666667 5.45110844103 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.336204069521 0.236089414692 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.102492583903 0.076458572812 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0844475822446 0.0737576698707 114% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.216905292248 0.150856017488 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0876758995444 0.0645574589148 136% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.71 10.9000537634 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.22 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.