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Some parents forbid young children from owning smart phones (cell phones with Internet access), while others disagree and believe that they are important tools for keeping in touch. Which point of view do you think is better, and why?

Essay topics: Some parents forbid young children from owning smart phones (cell phones with Internet access), while others disagree and believe that they are important tools for keeping in touch. Which point of view do you think is better, and why?

m.h_ghasempourabadi's picture

It is important to consider that parents are the leader of the family and are responsible for the kids. They have the authority to control the behaviors of the kids and correct it whenever it is needed. I am agree with the fact that the parents forbid the usage of cell phones for their kids. in fact with controlling over the usage of cell phones kids will be more concentrated on their educational activities. nowadays technology and smart phones are one of the most important features of social life. People are more tending to use cell phones in everyday life. while for a certain age group having access to a smart phones should be dangerous. Basically for kids under the age of 10, having a cell phone is not only necessary, but also it is harmful for several different reasons that I am going to describe them as following.

First of all, the contents that are accessible in the internet and through the cell phone are not proper for the kids. It is reported that kids are more prone to accidentally having access to the dark part of internet including pornography and trafficking sites. therefore it is recommended to have control over the usage of kids from the internet and obviously through the cell phones, there are not enough control from the parents.

Second, if kids have access to the cell phone they will be short in the amount of time that they are going to spend for their homework; and this will cause a huge problem in long term. Because kids are going to school everyday, and they are part of a specific school program, there are always lots of demand from the school to keep up with homework and the study plan. While having smart phone accessible always endanger the progress of the students for their education.

last but not the least, by using the cell phones, kids are more interested to stay at home and play a game within their cell phone. This is not negligible that physical activities are super important for the kids. and using more and more the cell phones will shorter the period of time that kids are spending outside to do such activities.

To conclude, although there should be some small benefits-such as keeping in touch with the kids for the students in using the cell phones. But there are lots of disadvantages for them in using the smart phones and by using them they will have several different problems as mentioned above. therefore my conclusion is that I am agree with forbidding young kids from owing smart phones.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 209, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'agreed'.
Suggestion: agreed
... correct it whenever it is needed. I am agree with the fact that the parents forbid t...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 209, Rule ID: AGREE_WITH_THE_FACT[1]
Message: Use simply 'agree that'.
Suggestion: agree that
... correct it whenever it is needed. I am agree with the fact that the parents forbid the usage of cell ph...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 294, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
...he usage of cell phones for their kids. in fact with controlling over the usage of...
^^
Line 1, column 413, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Nowadays
...trated on their educational activities. nowadays technology and smart phones are one of ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 566, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...ng to use cell phones in everyday life. while for a certain age group having access t...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 566, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “while” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ng to use cell phones in everyday life. while for a certain age group having access t...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 759, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'several'.
Suggestion: several
...y necessary, but also it is harmful for several different reasons that I am going to describe the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ing to describe them as following. First of all, the contents that are acc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 30, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...wing. First of all, the contents that are accessible in the inte...
^^
Line 5, column 277, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...ding pornography and trafficking sites. therefore it is recommended to have control over ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 277, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: therefore,
...ding pornography and trafficking sites. therefore it is recommended to have control over ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t enough control from the parents. Second, if kids have access to the cell ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 58, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d, if kids have access to the cell phone they will be short in the amount of time...
^^
Line 9, column 232, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY[3]
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
... term. Because kids are going to school everyday, and they are part of a specific school...
^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... the students for their education. last but not the least, by using the cel...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 13, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Last
...s for their education. last but not the least, by using the cell ph...
^^^^
Line 13, column 227, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: And
...ities are super important for the kids. and using more and more the cell phones wil...
^^^
Line 13, column 284, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...d more the cell phones will shorter the period of time that kids are spending outside to do su...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 245, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'several'.
Suggestion: several
...phones and by using them they will have several different problems as mentioned above. therefore ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 292, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
... different problems as mentioned above. therefore my conclusion is that I am agree with f...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 292, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: therefore,
... different problems as mentioned above. therefore my conclusion is that I am agree with f...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 329, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'agreed'.
Suggestion: agreed
...e. therefore my conclusion is that I am agree with forbidding young kids from owing s...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, therefore, while, in fact, such as, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 15.1003584229 185% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 61.0 52.1666666667 117% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 8.0752688172 12% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2049.0 1977.66487455 104% => OK
No of words: 437.0 407.700716846 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.68878718535 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57214883401 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.43140153398 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 177.0 212.727598566 83% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.405034324943 0.524837075471 77% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 639.0 618.680645161 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.4411854911 48.9658058833 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.45 100.406767564 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.85 20.6045352989 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.1 5.45110844103 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 22.0 5.5376344086 397% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.310990777422 0.236089414692 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114723277092 0.076458572812 150% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0474271140901 0.0737576698707 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.189828802458 0.150856017488 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0454506739171 0.0645574589148 70% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 10.9000537634 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.39 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 75.0 86.8835125448 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200

Rates: 61.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.